The Day Our Lives Turned Upside Down
by AlexisRose84
Summary: Summary: It's the fall of 2019 . John Bates has just retired from the US Army. He and his wife, Anna, are ready to start their new lives. An attack on Anna at his retirement party will turn their lives upside down. Deals with darker themes such as rape and miscarriages. COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

**_Summary:_****_ It's the fall of 2019. John Bates has just retired from the US Army. He and his wife, Anna, are ready to start their new lives. An attack on Anna at his retirement party will turn their lives upside down. Deals with darker themes such as rape and miscarriages. _**

_Apparently saying my muse is gone was a good way to bring it back, because here I am with my second story after I said I was done. This is my first attempt with a modern twist to Downton Abbey. It's a little scary bringing them out of their world and putting them into a new one. The idea came about thinking how it would have been different if Anna had been attacked in 2019 vs. the 1920s. I changed their ages some and made John and most of the cast American- only because I know America better. I hope you enjoy! _

**The Day Our Lives Turned Upside Down **

_Fall 2019_

_Savannah, Georgia _

The sun was just beginning to rise, splaying orange and pink colors over the walls, when John walked back into their hotel room. Out of habit, he had woken up before dawn to get his work out in for the day. His eyes settled down on his wife, who was still asleep in the king sized bed. A small chuckle left his lips seeing her spread out across the large surface. It appeared the moment he had left, she took the opportunity to make all the space her own.

John wanted to crawl into the bed with her and wake her with gentle kisses down her face, but he knew she needed her sleep. The two of them had been traveling cross country for the last several days.

After twenty-five years in the Army, John Bates was retiring and heading back home. His home wasn't far from Savannah, but he and his wife, Anna, had decided to stop there to visit the beautiful city. He had always admired its beauty.

Anna had moved to Savannah nearly ten years ago from York, England. Soon after, the two of them had met when he was stationed in a nearby city. Their mutual friends Robert and his daughter, Mary, had held a party where they had met. Their connection was instant. Even though he deployed only a month after they met, the two of them stayed connected through emails and phone calls.

Once he had returned from his deployment, the two married and began their adventure as a married couple. The nine years of marriage had not been easy on them between multiple deployments and miscarriages. But the two of them had survived and now he was retired. The good part about retiring from the Army was that they still had their lives ahead of them. John was only 46 and Anna, 35. Their move back to his home town would be their new beginning. The two would never have to be separated again and they could spend more time trying for that baby the two of them so desperately wanted.

They would be moving to St. Simons, Georgia. John had grown up in a small house on the small island with his mother. He had fond memories of living near the beach. He was hopeful of raising a child with those same memories. He had once asked Anna if she would rather retire in York, but Anna had shook her head. Her family memories were not good ones. She was happy to remain in America now. Perhaps one day, they could travel back and create better memories there.

On the island, John would be joining his dear friend, Robert's business. It was something John had assisted with when he could, but now was glad to be joining as a partner. Anna was hoping to return to teaching. Over the past years of moves and deployments, she had only been able to teach sporadically. Anna missed the enjoyment she got from seeing a young child learn something for the first time.

Anna's friend, Mary Talbot (also Robert's daughter), had invited them to stay at her guest house on Sea Island while they settled in and found their own place to live. The two of them were grateful for her kindness. It would allow them to find their perfect home on the island. Mary was even throwing a huge retirement party for John that night. So the two of them couldn't linger in Savannah too long for the day. They would need to get moving soon so they could settle in before the party.

John went to the shower to clean himself off, before deciding to wake Anna. He knew she was exhausted. Yesterday had been their fourth long day on the road. To be honest, he wished he was still sleeping as well. However, it was ingrained in him to wake early and work out.

As the water sprayed against his back, he heard the bathroom door open. John turned to find his sleepy wife standing in the doorway, rubbing her eyes. Her blonde hair was disheveled from tossing around in her sleep.

"I didn't mean to wake you," John said, as he poked his head out of the shower. Anna shook her head and yawned.

"It's fine," she told him. "My body is still thrown off from the time change."

"It's three hours earlier where we moved from. Go back to bed," John suggested.

"I would, but I've got a headache," Anna complained, rubbing her forehead.

"Take some ibuprofen and then go try to lie down and close your eyes." Anna nodded and did as he recommended.

When John was done with his shower, he walked out into the room to find Anna back asleep. Her left leg was sticking out of the covers while Anna had pulled the rest of the covers over her frame and had tucked them under her chin. John smiled. Then he quietly took a seat in one of the chairs and read so that she could get some rest.

-X-X-X-X-X-X

When they arrived at Mary and Henry Talbot's house, they were greeted by Charles Carson, the part time butler. He had worked for the Crawley family for many years. Once Robert and his wife, Cora, had decided to find a small condo to live in Mr. Carson had begun to work for Mary, with his wife, Elsie. The two mainly worked at large parties, helping set up the house and making sure the best of the best were cleaning and organizing everything. They had retired a few years prior, but because of their closeness to the family, they still helped out when they could.

"They have you working here tonight?" Charles laughed at John's question.

"Just for now. Everything will be handed down to the company we hired in a few hours. Elsie and I like to make sure everything is up to our standards before that," Charles explained.

Anna smiled and pulled Mr. Carson into a tight hug. She had known him and his wife for the past ten years. They had taken Anna under their wing when she first moved to America. Mr. Carson stiffened some, but smiled. He had a soft spot for the younger girl.

"Elsie will want to see you, as well. She's in the kitchen," Charles informed her. Anna left John and Charles to talk, before nearly skipping toward the kitchen. She was so happy to be back to the place she now considered home. While she had only lived in this area a year before she and John married, the place held a lot of happy memories for her.

In the kitchen, Elsie and Mary were working over a list for the party that evening. Seeing Anna, they both paused and smiled.

"Anna," Elsie said in her motherly fashion. She and Mary both walked over toward the blonde. She took Anna into her arms.

"We're so happy you both made it," Mary told her. "The plans for this evening have been all settled. We want the evening to be perfect for you both."

"That is so kind of you," Anna replied, stepping back from the hug. "I have missed you both."

"And we have missed you, as well." Mary stated. "I should probably go and check in on George. He likes it when I put him down for a nap. We'll catch up soon?"

"Yes," Anna agreed. Elsie took Anna's hands and gave them a tight squeeze.

"How were your travels?"

"Long," Anna honestly replied. "But we are so glad to be here."

"We're glad you are too," Elsie told her with a bright smile, then her smile faded slightly. She gently placed her hand on Anna's cheek and gave her a look of concern. "You look tired."

"I am," Anna said. "We've traveled from California. Just tired, is all."

Elsie's eyes narrowed. "Is there something else?"

A shy smile grew on Anna's lips and she glanced around to make sure it was only the two of them in the room.

"Yes," she answered, her smile slowly growing.

"You're not," Elsie's lips grew into an excited grin.

"I am," Anna confirmed. "But don't say anything to anyone yet, especially not John. It's very early and I've only just found out."

"I won't tell a soul, but I am so happy for you," Elsie told her sincerely.

"I don't want to get too excited, not yet," Anna began to anxiously twist her fingers in front of her. "We've already lost so many," she bit her lip. It had been a fear of hers since she did the test a few days ago. At the two pink lines, Anna had been elated. However, that only lasted a few seconds before fear had over taken her. She had suffered several miscarriages over the years and there was no guarantee this one would stick. The doctors had not been able to find a reason that she kept losing them. It had been so hard. After their last miscarriage, they had decided to put the idea of having kids away for the time being until he got out of the Army. So when Anna realized she was late, she assumed it was the stress of moving. The pink lines told her otherwise. She planned on telling John after tonight. She wanted all of the attention on him just for one day and then she could make it about them.

"I know," Elsie replied. She had flown out for Anna's last miscarriage. It had been her toughest, yet. The baby had made it to fifteen weeks. They had been sure that baby was going to make it. When she started to bleed out, the doctors were unsure Anna would make it either.

"John has probably taken our things to the guest house. I should go and get ready. You'll be here tonight?"

"I wouldn't miss it."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

It appeared Mary had spared no expense on John's retirement party. The house was full of guests. Some were people John and Anna barely knew. However, Mary had made sure to invite all of their close friends to the party as well. It was a fun event. There was enough food to feed the entire island and an open bar for everyone.

Fortunately, Anna had never been much of a drinker, so it didn't raise any suspicions when she didn't have a drink in her hand.

"Anna! John! Come meet my friend, Tony!" Mary called, as she walked closer to the two of them. Tony reached out his hands and gave them both a firm shake.

"Tony Gillingham," he said.

"And your friend?" Mary asked. Tony pointed to a guy standing in the corner.

"He's not really much of a friend. We work together and he kind of invited himself along. That's Alex Green. He's an okay guy. He does his job well," Tony shrugged his shoulders.

"Well, the more the merrier," Mary said with a bright smile, before heading off to do more hosting. Tony had a wistful look on his face as Mary walked away. Anna knew he had been in love with her for ages.

The pounding in Anna's head would not calm down.

"I'm going to walk to the guest house," Anna told John over the loud voices. "I need some medicine and I want to take off this jacket. It's hot in here."

John nodded.

Anna placed her hand on his shoulder and gave it a loving squeeze, before heading over to Mary's guest house. Just stepping out of the loud house made her head feel ten times better. She wasn't sure she had been ready for such a soiree. Traveling and being pregnant had taken it all out of her.

Walking into the guest house, she left the door unlocked. She only planned on being a quick minute to grab some medicine and remove her jacket. She headed into the kitchen and pulled the medicine out of her bag. Grabbing a cup, she went to the refrigerator to get some water. When she turned, she nearly jumped. Standing a few feet away from her was that man from the party, Alex Green.

"What are you doing here?" Anna tried to keep her voice even.

"I came to have a little fun. Don't you want to have fun?" Anna swallowed. Suddenly, she didn't feel safe at all. She remained her composure and shook her head.

"The fun is over at Mary's house."

Alex stepped toward her. She stepped back.

"You shouldn't be here," her hand reached for her phone on the table, but Alex pushed it away from her. "My husband will be following me in here any moment," she lied. Her back hit the refrigerator and she realized she was stuck.

"No," Alex informed her. "He won't. He had just begun a game when I left." Anna felt sick. Her mind tried to think of how to escape.

"Please," was all she could plead, when he grabbed her and pressed his lips to hers. She tried to push away, but he held her tightly in his grip. His hands dug deep into her shoulders. When she was able to release one arm and smack him across the face, he grew angry. His fist came up against her jaw. The crack of fist against the bone made her cry out in pain. She attempted to run from him, but he pulled her back by her hair, slamming her head into the corner of the island.

Her eyesight began to blur from the pain. She felt him yanking her back towards the bedroom and attempted to fight against his hold. But he was too strong and the pain in her head kept her from being able to fight back as much as she wanted to. Screams left her lips and he closed the door behind them, locking them in.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

John got up from the card table and laughed. The few games of poker had worked in his favor. A little extra pocket change was never a bad thing. His eyes scanned the room. Anna still wasn't back from the guest house. She had been gone for a while now.

"Mary?" He questioned, as she ran past him. Mary paused.

"Yes?"

"Have you seen Anna? She went to the guest house over an hour ago and I haven't seen her since." Mary shook her head. "I should go and check on her."

"No, it's your party. I'll go and check." John nodded. He was sure his wife had just fallen asleep. He felt badly staying or having fun if she was exhausted.

Mary left her home and walked briskly to the guest house next door. The first thing that stood out to her was the front door being ajar.

Peeking into the door, Mary called out, "Anna?" She slowly pushed herself into the house. Her eyes glanced around the living room. Stepping forward she called out for Anna again.

Mary shrugged, assuming she was asleep. Mary was about to turn on her heels and let her sleep, when she heard whimpering coming from the bedroom. Her ears perked up and she rushed to the door. She paused and knocked.

"Anna?" There was no answer. She pressed her ear up against the door to be sure she heard crying. Her heart sunk in her chest when she heard sobs.

"Anna," Mary said gently, pushing open the door. Whatever she had thought she would find on the other side of the door was not this. Anna was sitting, balled up in the corner of the room. Her face was covered in cuts and bruises and her dress… Mary covered her mouth with her hands to stifle the sigh of shock that tried to escape her lips. "Oh my God."

It was then that Anna registered someone else was in the room with her. She pressed her body against the wall and hid her face within her legs.

"Anna, it's only me," Mary said gently, bending down to Anna's level on the floor. She reached out to push Anna's hair out of her face, but Anna shook her head harshly.

"You….you can't touch me. The police…" Anna feebly explained. Mary slowly nodded. She had watched enough crime shows to know not to disturb the evidence. Thinking of Anna's body as evidence made Mary's stomach churn. Tears welled up in her eyes, but she blinked them back.

"I need to go get John," Mary said. "I…I can text him or call him."

"No," Anna cried. "It…it's his special night. I don't….."

"Okay. I will get you to the hospital first and then call him to meet us," Mary compromised. Anna nodded. She believed it would be better this way. He wouldn't see her completely like this. There she could be cleaned up some.

Mary quickly grabbed Anna some comfy clothes from her bag and followed Anna to her car. She made sure there was no one around. Thankfully, for Anna's sake, it appeared everyone was still inside partying.

In the car, Mary drove the long distance to the hospital. She could hear Anna's sobs next to her in the seat. She thought about asking who had done it, but decided she would let the cops to that. Right now, she just needed to help her friend in the best way she could.

Once Anna was taken back by one of the nurses, Mary found a quiet corner in the room to call John. He didn't answer. Mary sighed. Then she thought of Carson. He would answer her call.

"Mrs. Mary?" Mr. Carson asked confused.

"Hello, Mr. Carson. Will you please get John Bates for me? I need to speak with him. It's urgent."

Mary could hear the music, laughter, and talking on the other side of the phone. Then there was the shuffle of the phone being handed over. Mary could tell John had found a quiet place to speak.

"Mary?"

"John, you need to come to the hospital right away. It's Anna."

"What's happened?" There was desperation in his voice.

"I will tell you when you get here."

John hung up the phone and Mary wiped the stray tears that had fallen down her cheeks. She quickly headed back to the waiting room. The nurses had told her that as soon as the evidence was collected that she could go back to be with Anna. She wanted to make sure she was there when they came to get her.

_To be continued..._

_As always, let me know if you would like more. _


	2. Chapter 2

_Thank you all! Enjoy! _

**Chapter 2 **

Anna was fortunate that an advocate happened to be at the hospital when she arrived. The lady, whose name Anna had already forgotten, gently discussed the process she was about to go through. Anna was informed that she could skip anything she felt uncomfortable with and that she would speak up for her at any point it was needed.

"This can take a while," the lady told her. "Would you have someone you would like in here with you?"

Anna's eyes filled with tears. She wanted her husband, but she wasn't sure she was comfortable with the idea of him in the room watching as she went through this. Her head shook.

"I….." Anna stuttered. "I'm pregnant." Anna twisted her wedding ring around her finger as the tears fell onto her cheeks. "I'm not very far along, but….I'm so worried…"

"Do you know how far along you are?"

"Five or six weeks," Anna's voice hitched into her throat. After the attack, there had been so much blood between her legs. Anna was concerned she had lost her baby.

"I will let the doctor know. First we need to take off all of your clothing and put them into a bag. Then they will probably want to treat these cuts first, before doing the examination. Remember, if at any time you want to stop or skip a step, let me or the doctors know."

Anna nodded. She felt disconnected from her body. It was as if she was watching someone else. She closed her eyes and the lady helped remove her dress from her body. If she was shocked at what she saw, Anna couldn't tell. Anna removed her undergarments and was given a hospital gown to dress into.

Sitting on the bed with the gown on brought back fresh memories of the last time she had been in the hospital. Her hands landed on her abdomen and she could feel the fear bubbling up her throat. Suddenly, she needed John. She had gone through losing their last baby without him, because he had been deployed. She wasn't sure she could do this without him.

"I…I want my husband," Anna firmly stated. "Please." The lady nodded.

"Can you tell me his name?"

"John Bates."

The lady stepped out of the room leaving Anna all alone. Anna closed her eyes, but then all she could feel were _his _hands over her frame. No matter how much she screamed or begged, he wouldn't stop.

The door opened. Anna jerked her eyes opened.

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Bates. Your husband hasn't arrived yet. Your friend, Mary, is here. Would you like her to join?" Anna feebly nodded. "I will get her and then they will begin the examination."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Frustration ran through John's body. His car was blocked in by several other cars. It would take him a while to find out which car belonged to which person. It had never occurred to him to have his car somewhere that it couldn't be blocked.

"John?" He heard Tom Branson call out concerned. John turned to find Tom and his wife, Sybil, standing on the patio sipping some wine. "Do you need help?"

"I need to get to the hospital, but my car is blocked in."

"We can walk over to our house. I'll drive you," Tom offered. Tom, Sybil, and their children lived just a few houses over. John sighed in relief.

"Thank you."

Tom and Sybil walked down the stairs to meet up with Tom and then they led him to their house.

"Are you coming too?" Tom asked his wife, she shook her head.

"No, I thought I'd tuck the girls in to bed. They do better for me than the babysitter," she gave Tom a kiss on his cheek.

"I do hope everything is alright," Sybil told John.

"Thank you," John told her sincerely. He hoped so too. His mind was going a million miles a minute trying to figure out what could have happened to his wife that would need him to rush to the hospital. She had been complaining of a headache all day. Perhaps she had taken ill. Mary's voice had seemed very anxious on the phone. He wished she would have just told him, but there had to be a reason that she didn't.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Mary felt somewhat silly in her dress that was covered by a large white paper cover. They had made her put on gloves and a hat to cover her hair. She understood why, but it made her feel uncomfortable. Although, she knew Anna felt a million times worse and she was grateful she could be with her friend.

Mary had been placed up at Anna's head. She watched as the doctor's combed over Anna's body. It seemed as though she was invading Anna's privacy being in the room. She nearly fainted when the doctor pulled up a swab between Anna's legs and it was covered in blood. To not give herself away, she turned to look at Anna and give her a reassuring smile. However, Anna seemed elsewhere. Her eyes were focused on a corner spot in the room. It was probably better that way.

It seemed the examination was lasting forever. They needed to get all sorts of evidence. Mary was impressed at how calm Anna was handling the entire thing. Mary wanted to cry, but seeing how stoic Anna was being, she bit her lip to keep herself from breaking down.

"You can sit up now," the doctor told Anna. Mary assisted Anna.

"Will…will you see if John is here?" Anna's voice was so quiet that it took a moment for Mary to register what Anna had said.

"Can I?" Mary asked the advocate. She wasn't sure she was allowed to leave the room.

"You can leave the room, but now that this has begun, we can't let anyone else in."

"Anna, what do you want me to do? Would you rather I stay here with you?" Mary's voice was calm.

"There isn't much left, Mrs. Bates," the advocate said calmly.

"Go…please," Anna cried. "I don't want him to worry." Mary's lips twisted.

"If that's what you want," Mary replied.

Mary stepped out of the room and found a bin to throw the paper cover and gloves into. She fussed a moment with her hair, before heading back to the waiting room. She was unsurprised to find John sitting and waiting anxiously. He was hunched over with his head in his hands. Mary walked up to him and gently placed her hand on his shoulder. John glanced up.

"Mary! Is…is Anna okay? I asked to go and see her, but they said I had to wait here." Mary's eyes glanced around the waiting room. It was full of people.

"Let's go and talk in the hallway," Mary stated. John sighed, but followed her. Mary suddenly felt unequipped to deal with this. How does one tell one's husband that his wife has been beaten and raped? Her hands began to anxiously twist in front of her.

"What's happened? Is Anna okay?"

"She…" Mary paused. "Um…no. No, she's not okay," Mary replied. "When I went to check in on her at the guest house, she…." Mary swallowed hard. She couldn't meet John's eyes. Mary took a deep breath and decided just to say it quickly, like taking off a band aid. "John, she was…she was raped." Her eyes moved up to John's then and he looked as if he had been sucker punched to the gut.

"What? How? By who?" He stumbled out.

"I don't know," Mary answered honestly. Anna hadn't told her anything about the attack. "I just found her and…" Mary's breath hitched in her throat.

"Why didn't you get me from the party?" John asked, hurt. He should have been there for his wife, not playing rounds of poker with some random people he barely knew.

"I wanted to. Anna didn't want to ruin your night."

John sighed. His hand rubbed over his face in frustration. That was his sweet Anna. Even when she endured so much, she still put his needs over her own.

"I stayed with her through most of her examination, but she wanted me to come out to find you," Mary informed him. "We have to stay out of the room now, since it's been started. However, it should be done soon and then you can go in and be with her."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

It still took close to another forty-five minutes before anyone came out to give John or Mary any news on Anna.

"Mr. Bates?" A lady called, making John nearly leap out of his chair.

"Yes?" The lady led him to a quiet area of the hospital.

"Hello, my name is Julia Davis, I am Anna's advocate. I am here to be an extra voice for Anna and talk her through all of the steps. They just finished the examination and moved her into her own private room. They would like to keep her overnight. There is a chance she is suffering from a concussion, so they want to watch her closely."

John's fists clinched next to his frame. He wanted just ten minutes with the guy who had done this to his wife.

"Can I go and see her now?"

"In a moment," Julia responded. "There are a couple things I wanted to discuss with you first. Anna has given me permission to share them with you. The police will be here shortly to take Anna's statement. It is important that you let them do their job and not interject at any time. I am her advocate and I will speak up if it is needed. The second matter," Julia paused. "Your wife informed me that she is pregnant."

The color from John's face drained. "She never… The baby?"

"It is too early to know if everything is okay with the baby. She is not far along at all. Mrs. Bates wanted you to know. It is important you go into the room patient. Don't try to touch her or ask her too many questions. Let her lead any discussion."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Anna allowed the hot water spray all over her sore body. She was relieved to finally be able to wash her skin. In the examination, Anna had felt incredibly exposed and dirty. But she had known she needed to do it.

Within the safety of the shower, sobs finally escaped her lips. She pressed her forehead against the tile and cried for everything she had lost. She no longer felt like herself. Everything had been torn away from her.

Pushing herself up, Anna ran the soap over every inch of her skin. The scalding water and soap, however, did little to make her feel as though she was clean. No matter what she did, she could still feel _him_ all over her.

She remained in the water until it became stark cold. Goosebumps covered her small frame. She stepped out of the shower and wrapped one of the flimsy towels around her. Avoiding the mirror, she dried off her skin. Then she grabbed the bag Mary had packed for her. She was grateful Mary had thought about doing that for her. There was some comfort of being in her own things instead of the stuff at the hospital. Anna slipped on a large sweatshirt and the sweat pants.

When she exited the bathroom, she was happily surprised to find John sitting next to Julia in the chairs in the corner. Seeing her husband, new tears fell from her eyes.

"John,' she cried.

John immediately stood from his chair. He took a quick step forward and wanted to pull her into his arms, but remembered what Julia had told him. However, Anna rushed to him and wrapped her arms around him breaking into heartbreaking sobs. Slowly, he brought his arms around her and held her close.

"I will give you both a moment," Julia told them, slipping out the door.

Anna pulled back gently and met John's eyes, before more sobs escaped her lips. John cautiously placed his hands on her cheeks and gently caressed her cheekbones with his thumbs.

"I…I'm so sorry," Anna cried.

"What? Why are you apologizing?" Anna just sobbed. John brought her back into his arms, feeling inadequate. He didn't know how to make this right for her.

A knock came at the door. John looked up to find Julia poking her head into the door.

"Are you ready to speak with the detectives?"

John felt Anna tense in her arms. He held her a little tighter.

"You don't have to do this right now," he whispered into her ear. Anna pulled away and shook her head.

"No, I need to do it now. If I don't, I will lose my nerve," she explained. John took her hand as the two detectives walked in behind Julia.

_To be continued..._


	3. Chapter 3

_Going ahead and updating while I can. This weekend will be busy. _

**Chapter 3**

John's eyes couldn't remove themselves from Anna's hands. As she spoke with the detectives, Anna kept pulling anxiously at each finger. He wanted to be able to take it all the pain and fear away from her. If he could take on everything, he would.

"He grabbed my arms tightly and then kissed me. I…I was able to break one arm away from him, so I hit his face. It made him mad and he…he punched me in my jaw," Anna's shaking hand came up to the bruise that was already forming. "After that was when he pulled my head into the corner of the island. Then…" Anna's voice faded. John's jaw clinched. All he could see was red. The man that did this was a dead man.

"Mrs. Bates, we can always get more information later," the female detective told her gently. "Do you know who did this to you? Or can you give us any details to help us find him?"

Anna bit anxiously on her lower lip.

"It's okay if you can't right now. We can come back tomorrow…"

"No, I know his name," Anna told them. John's eyes jerked up.

"Who was it?" John asked, his jaw tightening.

"Mr. Bates," Julia warned.

Anna's eyes glistened with tears. "His name is Alex Green."

"And how do you know him?"

"I…I don't," Anna replied, her voice tightening in her throat. "He works with a friend of our friend, Mary. He invited himself to John's retirement party. I only saw him from across the room before…" Anna paused, her eyes falling down to her hands.

"Mrs. Bates, would you like to be done now?" Julia asked her. Anna nodded. "Alright, that will be all for tonight," Julia spoke up for Anna.

As Julia led the detectives out of the room, John turned to Anna. He saw she was zoned out, but tears were falling down her eyes. Nearly every ounce of him wanted to go and search for that Mr. Green before the cops could get to him. He would be wishing for the police by the time he was done with him.

"You can't do that, you know," Anna said to him, her eyes glancing up at John.

"What was that, darling?"

"I know what you're thinking; you can't kill him," She stated. Her hands came up to her bruised face and wiped the tears away with the back of her hands. "I need to lay down. My head hurts." John's face fell in concern. The doctor said she would need her rest. The time with the detectives had probably taken too much out of her. Having a concussion rest was important.

Once he had helped her into the bed, John turned off the lights to give her eyes some rest. The only light left in the room came from a light from the street outside her window.

"I mean it, John. I need you," she said strongly.

"I'm not going anywhere," he told her. "Close your eyes and rest."

Anna grabbed his hands and held them tightly. "Promise me you won't do anything stupid. "

"Anna…"

"Promise me, John. I can't lose you. I…" her voice broke.

John sighed, but he nodded. "I promise." Anna settled some and John pulled the covers up over her frame. "Get some rest."

X-X-X-X-X-X

Mary arrived home close to four in the morning. She had remained at the hospital until Anna had spoken with the police and after John told her that Anna was asleep. She had been in shock when she heard the attacker was Alex Green. Mary wanted to call Tony and tell him what a monster the guy he worked with was. However, she knew not to say anything. Alex Green might think he was in the clear. Any heads up that the police would be coming after him and he would likely disappear. No, Mary did not want that.

Climbing up the staircase, Mary sighed. This was not how she expected the evening to go. Dim light came from her bedroom. She stepped in to see that Henry had left the television on for her. It made her smile. He always thought about what would make her the most comfortable.

Quickly undressing and throwing on a night gown, Mary climbed into her bed. Almost immediately, Henry rolled into her and pulled her into his arms. He was a cuddlier. He slept better after holding her close for a while.

In the safety of her husband's arms, Mary began to cry. Mary hadn't known just how affected she was by it all until then. Henry's arms tightened around her and he lifted up his head.

"Mary?" He questioned. Mary turned in his arms so she could face him.

"I'm sorry I woke you," she said wiping her eyes.

"What happened?" He questioned, worried. Mary hadn't told him what had happened. She had just texted him to take over the party and that she would fill him in when she got home.

Mary shook her head. "You can't say anything, not yet," she told him. She knew it was important to both Anna and John for her to use discretion. "Anna was attacked- raped, by someone who came to the party."

Henry sat up. "Is she okay?" Mary shook her head.

"No," She replied honestly. "I…I found her in the guest house…" She paused. Henry's hand rested lovingly on her cheek.

"Why don't you get some sleep and then tomorrow you can go and check on her," he suggested. Mary nodded. She gratefully sunk back into his strong arms. She felt so lucky to have found him.

After the death of Matthew four years ago, Mary never thought she could be happy again. Then Henry came into her life. Not only did he love her, but he loved George. Nothing could have been more important to her.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_Afghanistan_

_April 2017_

The phone felt heavy in John's hand. For the past several days, John had been on a special ops mission. He had been pulled out one day early to be told his wife was in the hospital and had lost the baby. His heart felt heavy. He needed to be with her, but he couldn't. What had happened wasn't considered emergent enough to send him home. Perhaps if he hadn't just begun his deployment two weeks ago, they would have made different concessions for him.

Right before he had left, he and Anna had gone to the doctor's appointment. She had been thirteen weeks along. During the ultrasound, they had heard the strongest heartbeat. The sound had brought them both to tears. For the first time, they were sure they would have a baby in several months.

_"When you come home, we'll have a baby,"_ Anna had told him enthusiastically. But now they wouldn't.

"Hello?" It was Elsie's voice on the other line. John was grateful someone was there with Anna when he couldn't be.

"Mrs. Carson," John replied, his voice uneven. "Can…can I speak with Anna?"

"Yes, hold on."

"John?" Once she said his name, she broke down into sobs. John felt so helpless, being miles and miles apart.

"Shh," he murmured. "I wish I could be there."

"I'm so sorry," Anna cried. Her apologizing broke his heart.

"Anna, this is _not_ your fault."

"I can't do it; I can't have children for you." John wished he could reach through the phone and pull her into his arms.

"Anna, my darling. You've been through so much. Please don't put any blame on yourself."

"I'm sorry; I'm so sorry," Anna sobbed, not registering what John was saying. John heard the phone being handed over.

"John," Elsie said into the phone. "I don't think she can talk right now." John's jaw tightened and tears filled his eyes.

"Please tell Anna that I love her and that none of this is her fault," John pleaded.

"I will. Goodbye, John."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_Now_

John awoke with a start. Memories of Anna blaming herself for the loss of their last baby had plagued his dreams. Slowly opening his eyes, he saw that the sun was up. His eyes glanced at the clock and saw it was nearing nine. Anna was still asleep. She had woken screaming at one point and the doctors offered her a mild sedative to help her sleep better.

The way she had apologized to him last night reminded him of her apologizing to him over the phone. She blamed herself for the attack. His heart felt as though it was being tightened with a vice. He wasn't sure how to reassure her that she had no blame in this. It had taken the longest time for Anna to no longer blame herself for her last miscarriage, and to be honest, he wasn't sure she still didn't blame herself some.

Anna turned in her sleep so that she was facing John. John's lips twitched. The bruise on her chin had become darker and the cut above her eye appeared sharper. His hands tightened into fists. Anger consumed him. The anger faded, however, when he saw Anna's eyes flutter open.

"Anna," he said calmly, inching his chair closer to her.

At the realization of where she was and what had happened, Anna's face crumpled. Anna turned onto her back and grimaced at how sore her entire body was. A sob escaped her lips and she hid her face away from John.

"Anna," John felt helpless.

"Please go," she cried into her hands.

"Anna." It was a plea. She couldn't push him away, not now.

"Go," she said strongly, her face coming out of her hands.

"Anna…."

"I've ruined everything. I'm ruined. Please go, please." The desperation in Anna's voice made John want to cry.

"Anna, darling, you…."

"Go!" She screamed. "Go, go, go!"

John felt unbelievably powerless. He wanted to pull her into his arms and hold her tight, letting her know he would never let her go. However, he wanted to respect her wishes. If she needed him to leave the room right now, then he would do it.

Stepping outside of the room, his back fell against the wall and he finally broke down.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"John?" Mary asked calmly, feeling uncomfortable to find him crying in the hallway. John immediately wiped away his tears and straightened himself up. He shook his head and gave her a grin.

"Mary."

"I…I brought you both some more clothes and some toiletries. We are preparing our guest room upstairs in our house for you both. Do you know when she'll be discharged?"

John shook his head. "They want to watch her for at least twenty-four hours. She likely won't be able to leave until sometime tomorrow."

Mary handed over the bag she had packed to John. Her eyes glanced to the room. John could tell that she wanted to go inside and see Anna.

"You can't go in right now. She wants to be alone." Mary pierced her lips, disappointed.

"Will you keep me updated?" Mary asked. John nodded.

When Mary walked away, John allowed himself to lean back against the wall. He didn't want to leave Anna's door. If she asked for him, she wanted to be right there for him.

"Mr. Bates?" John turned his head to see the doctor walking down the hallway. John stood back up.

"Yes, doctor."

"Anna's lab results have come back in," he informed John. "Should we go into the room?" John shook his head.

"Anna needs her rest." The doctor nodded. Anna had already given them permission to share everything with her husband.

"Everything has come back clean. We did a pregnancy test. Her HGC levels were what we would expect at 5 or 6 weeks. We will test again in this evening to see if they grow. That will let us know if the pregnancy is still viable." John nodded. He and Anna were no strangers to these types of blood tests. They had often come back with bad news. He prayed they didn't this time.

"Thank you, doctor."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Anna felt horrible for screaming at John, but she needed him away from her. She was spoiled; she no longer deserved him. She felt trapped. Climbing out of the bed, Anna cried out in pain. The pain relievers the doctors had given her the night before had worn off. She stumbled over the edge of the bottom of the tray table. It made her angry. She grabbed the plate of food and threw it to the floor.

"Anna?" John pushed into the door, concerned.

"No, go away," she told him. She didn't know why she was so angry at him. It wasn't his fault; it was hers. John, thankfully, respected her wishes and disappeared back behind the door.

It was then she crumbled onto the floor and began to sob.

_To be continued..._


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"Anna?" Elsie's voice quietly questioned, as she poked her head into Anna's hospital room. Anna was sitting in one of the chairs staring out of the window. She turned and tried to give Elsie a smile, but her lips trembled. "May I come in?" Anna nodded.

Elsie walked in and took the empty seat next to Anna.

"Don't be mad at John, but he told me what happened. He wanted you to have someone with you," she explained.

Anna shook her head. "I'm not mad that he told you." And she meant that. Of all the people in the world, she was most okay with Elsie knowing. The woman had been like a mother to her for the past ten years. Had it not been for her, she likely wouldn't have made it through her last miscarriage.

"He didn't tell anyone else," Elsie assured her. Anna had known that without Elsie needing to tell her. John would know not to tell everyone he saw. Even if she didn't deserve it, he would look out for her.

"Why is John sitting out in the waiting room and not in here with you?" Elsie questioned gently. Anna swallowed hard, before biting on the side of her lip.

"I…" her voice hitched. "I…I must have made this happen and John deserves better. I am spoiled for him."

"Anna.." Elsie said. Her eyes filled with tears from her confession. "You are not at fault here. John loves you very much. He doesn't blame you."

"But I feel dirty," she cried. "And if I lose this baby because of this, I am just failing him, yet again."

"Anna," Elsie stated strongly, "You have never failed John. That man loves you very much."

Anna nodded. "I…I know." She took her fingers and slowly wiped the few tears that had fallen from her eyes. Her eyes closed. The interaction was draining and making her head hurt.

"You should lie down," Elsie told her, noting the pain on Anna's face. Anna slowly stood up and did as Elsie suggested. Lying down on the bed, she gave Elsie a grateful smile.

"Thank you for coming and talking with me," she told her.

"Shall I go and fetch John now?" Anna nodded. "Good. You rest, my love. I will come by and check on you later, okay?"

"Okay."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_St. Simons, GA_

_July 2009_

Not having a family, John always found that he spent his leave visiting his close friend, Robert, in Georgia. This particular block leave, he had come to his old home for the 4th of July celebrations. Robert's family tended to have large parties for every occasion.

Having a lot of money and influence in the small town, the Crawley's had managed to secure a private area on the beach to celebrate. It was a nice celebration. Red, white, and blue colors filled every available spot.

"John!" Mary, Robert's daughter, had called to him. Next to Mary, stood the most beautiful woman John had ever seen. She was the only person at the party wearing a purple dress.

"Hello, Mary," he said kindly. "Very nice get together."

"Yes," Mary replied, curtly. Then she turned to her friend, "This is Anna Smith. She is new to the area. Anna works in Savannah."

"Hello, Anna?"

"Hello." Ah, he thought. She was not American. Her dress made sense now. Mary got pulled away by her sister, Sybil, leaving the two of them alone.

Anna appeared a little nervous; she bit down on the side of her lip.

"I feel a little out of place. I should have known to wear red, white, or blue. I've never been to a 4th of July party before today. Not sure I'm even allowed,' she joked.

"You are," John replied with a smile that wouldn't go away. Anna's nervous smile brightened.

"Are you from here?"

"I am. I grew up near the Village. Have you been there?" Anna shook her head.

"Not yet."

"Perhaps we can go and visit it together one day?" Anna's cheeks blushed.

"Perhaps."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_Now_

Thinking back on old memories made John smile. That day, he had known he would marry her. But now, John sat nervously tapping his fingers on the side of his chair.

Anna took a shower in the hospital bathroom. She had been in there for a while and he wanted to know for sure that she was okay. They had been told that Anna needed as much rest as possible. For her head to heal, lying down and as little of interactions as possible, were needed.

Just as he was about to stand up to go and check on her, he heard the water turn off. He sighed, relieved.

He was so glad that Anna had allowed him to come back into her room. Being away from her for those few hours had been torture. At his return, Anna hadn't said much. She had been tired and in pain. John worried she was hiding within herself; that she was refusing help from him. All he wanted to do was be there for her. He hated she was going through this.

The door opened and Anna stepped out slowly. With every step, John could see she was in discomfort. The ache on her face was visible. He stood, ready to help if she asked.

"I'm okay," she told him, finally making it to her bed. "I think I need to sleep. I just…." She paused. He knew what she wanted to say. Sleeping brought about nightmares of what had happened to her.

Tears began to leave Anna's eyes. She was so tired of crying.

"I'm sorry," she cried. She felt so weak.

"Anna, you have nothing to apologize for," John stated strongly.

"But…I…I left the door unlocked. I didn't fight hard enough. I…" John walked up to Anna and placed his hands firmly, but lovingly, on her shoulders. She tensed. His eyes widened in recognition of why she didn't want him to touch him there, as he removed his hands. Then he reached out to take her hands within his, grateful when she didn't tense at his touch.

"Anna, none of this is your fault."

"But…I….I am ruined for you," she said, crying harder.

"What?"

"I can't be who I was for you before." John swallowed hard.

"Anna, you are the woman I fell in love with," he told her carefully. He reached his hand up to the side of the jaw where she wasn't bruised. "You are no different than you were before to me. That man…" John paused, his jaw tightening. "He doesn't define who you are. I love you. I will never stop loving you."

"Truly?" Anna asked, her lower lip quivering.

"Truly," John replied strongly. He gently pushed the stray hair off of Anna's face and pressed a gentle kiss on her temple.

"I feel so lost," Anna confessed, falling into John's strong arms. John held her close and allowed her to sob into his shoulder.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_The Next Day _

Sybil and Tom were enjoying a kid free day. Her parents, Robert and Cora, had offered to take their two daughters for the weekend. The two walked along the pier, enjoying as the wind wafted the smell of the ocean around them.

"Do you think Sybbie and Lilly are behaving themselves?" Sybil asked Tom, as they looked over the water. Their two daughters were six and five. Sybil had decided to name her first daughter after herself. She said men did it all the time, so why shouldn't she? Tom had agreed, but they called her Sybbie for short. Her parents had been mortified at the time, but they eventually came around of the idea. Then Lillian (Lilly) was born almost exactly a year after her sister. Two girls in one year turned their world upside down, but in a good way.

Sybbie's birth had been complicated. Sybil had preeclampsia and needed to be hospitalized a month before her due date. Thankfully, with modern medicine, everything went smoothly with her birth. Then, Lilly had been a surprise. They hadn't expected to have another baby so soon. However, she had been a wonderful addition to their family.

"I'm sure they are. I'd be willing to bet that your dad is spoiling the two of them," Sybil nodded and smiled. She would agree. He enjoyed being a grandfather to his four grandchildren. Sybil knew he missed Marigold, who lived in England with Sybil's sister and her mother, Edith. But Robert and Cora visited them whenever they could.

Sybil's phone began to ring. She glanced down and sighed.

"It's the hospital."

"Don't answer," Tom naughtily said. "We don't have the girls."

"I have to; I'm on call," she reminded him. Tom sighed.

Sybil walked to a less crowded corner of the pier so she could hear the other end of the line. Sybil was an OBGYN. Her practice was on the island, but she also worked on call to deliver babies at the hospital. Sometimes she would be called in for special cases. It appeared that was the case today. Her lips turned into a frown when she heard why she was being called in. She had been hoping it was for a delivery.

"I have to go," She told Tom, walking back over toward him.

"New baby?" He questioned. "Is it one of your patients?" Sybil shook her head.

"It's not a birth. Not today."

The two of them walked back toward their car. Not much was said. Sybil couldn't tell Tom why she was going in anyway. She was often chosen for trauma or high risk births, since she was specialized in those situations. It appeared this was one of those. It broke her heart. Some woman who was pregnant had been raped. They wanted her to come in and look at test results and then speak with her.

Sybil dropped Tom off at their house, before rushing to the hospital. She parked her car in the lot and paused, before getting out of the car. Even though she had specialized in women who had suffered trauma, it didn't make it any easier. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath and then exited her car.

Once she entered the hallway of the hospital, she was handed the file on the patient she would be seeing that day. Her eyes scanned over the information. Lips twisting as she saw the comments on the damage the woman had suffered from the attack.

"What room?" She asked the nurse. Sybil nodded at the response. She walked to the room and paused at the door. She realized she hadn't looked at the woman's name. Her eyes fell to the front page and her stomach nearly dropped out of her. _Anna Bates. _No, not Anna. She thought. Tears threatened to prickle behind her eyes, but she pushed them back. She was the professional here. She needed to go in calm and collected. That was her job.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

John and Anna were playing a low key game of Go, Fish. They had been told that Anna should be discharged within the next hour. Anna was ready to leave the hospital. She was tired of all the poking and prodding. John told her they would be staying in Mary's house for now. Both he and Mary knew she wouldn't want to go back into the guest house. It would be more crowded with them all in Mary's house. Perhaps they would find their own home sooner, John had said with a smile. It seemed too perfect to Anna, however, because nothing seemed like it could be happy again.

"You can't do that," Anna told John, her eyes narrowing.

"I can," John replied with a smirk. "You can add a number to a pile you already have."

"But…"

Anna was interrupted by a knock on the door. They were both surprised when Sybil walked into the room.

"Hello, Anna, John," she said kindly. "I didn't realize I was coming to you until I reached your door. If you are uncomfortable with me as your doctor, I can call in another OBGYN."

"No," Anna said softly. "I am actually glad it's you," Anna told her honestly. Sybil was the kindest soul she had ever met. While the two of them hadn't been as close as she and Mary, the two had grown close when Anna kept miscarrying. Sybil had spoken with her on the phone and talked her through what questions to ask her doctor and what tests to fight for. When Anna had found out she was pregnant again, her first thought was that she wanted Sybil to be her doctor.

"I am sorry that it has to be under these circumstances," Sybil told her. Anna nodded, her eyes falling to her hands. "I do have good news." Anna's eyes jerked back up to meet Sybil's. "Your HCG levels have grown as we would have liked. All signs point to a healthy pregnancy," she said with a smile.

Anna reached over to grab John's hand.

"Really?"

"Yes," Sybil replied. "It is still early. With your history, there are a few things I would like to try," she told her. "In about two weeks, we can do an abdominal ultrasound to see the heartbeat."

"What about a transvaginal one now?" Anna asked, anxious to know if her baby had a strong heartbeat. She knew the ins and outs of early pregnancy after the five she had been through.

"I am not sure we should do that right now with trauma you experienced. There were several lacerations. We don't want to cause more or risk an infection," Sybil gently explained. Anna nodded, but she was disappointed. Sybil could see the disappointment on Anna's face. "Anna," she said strongly. "Your numbers are very good and they grew, like we want. It's good news."

"Thank you, Syb…I mean, Dr. Branson," John told her with a kind wink. "We do appreciate it."

"We do," Anna said quietly.

"I will set up your appointment at my office in two weeks," Sybil told them both with a smile. "After I leave here, I will have the nurses come in with the discharge paperwork. It is important that you rest, Anna. You need a few more days to recover from the concussion. If you have any nausea, blurriness, or really bad headaches, you need to come back to the ER."

"What if I have nausea from the pregnancy?" Anna questioned. Sybil smiled.

"Then that's a great sign. If you can tell the difference, then you don't need to come in. However, if you are not sure, I would rather you be safe than sorry."

"I will be watching her like a hawk," John told Sybil.

"I know you will. Any other questions?" Sybil asked. They both shook their heads.

"What you have been through was very traumatic, I can find you both someone to talk to or a group to go to. I highly suggest that you do," Sybil said. Anna just swallowed hard. Sybil gave her a small smile. "I'll see you in two weeks to see that baby's heartbeat?"

"Okay."

"Great." Sybil left, leaving Anna and John together.

"I…I didn't lose it. I was so sure…" John got up from his seat and maneuvered himself so that he could sit next to Anna on the bed.

"That's a strong little one in there," John told Anna. His eyes asked for permission to touch her abdomen and she nodded. Slowly, John placed his hand carefully on her abdomen and gave it a gentle rub. "What should we call this one?"

With every pregnancy, they had given the baby a nickname to call it until they knew the gender. Sadly, they had never gotten to that stage with any of their pregnancies. However, Anna had been so grateful for those nicknames. It was the way she could remember her lost babies by. Her hand covered John's and she rested her head on his shoulder.

"Hope."

_To be continued..._

_A little bit of brightness in a sad story. There is, of course, still plenty of storm to go through before the end. Let me know what you think. Thanks for reading!_


	5. Chapter 5

_Thank you!_

**Chapter 5**

John grabbed the bags, refusing to let Anna carry a thing. Anna sighed with a shake of her head; she should have known he would go overboard in the taking care of her department. They were awaiting a call from Mary to say she had arrived at the hospital to pick them up. John's car was still at her house.

A knock came at the door. John inched it open to see the two detectives standing outside the doorway.

"This isn't really a good time," he told them. "She's about to leave and she really doesn't need to talk with her concussion."

"It'll just be a moment," the woman detective told him. John wasn't happy about it, but he let them into the room.

"Sorry to bother you, Mrs. Bates," the man started. "We wanted to let you know that there is a warrant out for Alexander Green's arrest."

"You haven't arrested him, yet?" Anna questioned. Her face went pale.

"No," the lady replied. There was an apology in the way she spoke. "But we are searching for him. We wanted you to know."

"Thank you," John curtly replied. He felt like their showing up to tell them this was unimportant. They could have just called. He wondered if they had been hoping for more of a statement from Anna. However, when they arrived, they likely realized they wouldn't be getting more today. "Will that be all?"

"Yes," the two responded in accidental unison.

"Please come in as soon as you are ready to add more to your statement," the man added, before the two of them left the room.

John was grateful when the two of them were gone. While he knew they were just trying to do their jobs, now was not the best time. Between the rape, the bruises, and the concussion, Anna needed time to heal. She had already given them enough to arrest the bastard.

_Ding._

Looking at his phone, John saw it was a text from Mary saying she was parked outside. He glanced up at Anna and his heart dropped. Her fingers were anxiously tapping against one another and her face was covered in fear. Knowing that Alex Green was still out there somewhere was clearly terrifying her.

"Anna," he said gently. Anna's eyes jerked up to meet his and she gave a weak smile. John sighed; he hated this for her. "Mary is here."

Carrying all the bags and paper work, John walked right behind Anna. He watched her frail frame closely. Perhaps he should have insisted they use a wheel chair. Anna had been insistent that she didn't need it, but John wasn't sure.

Seeing them come out of the building, Mary stepped out of her car. The trunk opened for John to place the bags. Mary led Anna into the front seat and handed her a bottle of water.

"There is also a chocolate bar in the middle console," Mary told her with a wink. Anna meekly smiled. As kind as it was, Anna didn't feel like eating anything. All she wanted to do was get to Mary's house, shower, and go to bed.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"There are extra blankets and pillows in the closet. This hallway is all yours. There is an extra bedroom if you need to put stuff in there or make it an office, while you search for a house. Please, make yourself at home." Mary told the two of them. Both John and Anna were thankful for Mary's hospitality. She had gone above and beyond.

Mary walked out of the room and John turned to find Anna frantically looking through her bags. Her body was tense and tears were beginning to fall down her eyes.

"Darling?"

"I…I can't find my other sweatshirt," she said desperately. John's brows creased.

"It's warm in Mary's house. Wouldn't you rather just wear a t-shirt?" At his suggestion, her head shook anxiously.

"No…I…I need my sweatshirt," she told him. John went into his bag and pulled out one of his hoodies.

"Will this do?" He offered. Anna nodded. She slowly took it from his hands. Then she disappeared into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

Taking a deep breath, John sunk down onto the mattress. His head fell into his hands. Once he heard the water running, tears began to fall out of his eyes. He felt so defeated.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

In the bathroom, Anna turned on the water to steaming hot. She was grateful that the water could be so much warmer here than it had been at the hospital. Waiting for it to warm all the way up, she sat down on the toilet seat. The hardness of the seat made her wince. New tears formed in her eyes. Her body was ruined. How could she ever be normal again?

Steam began to fill the room. The mirror slowly fogged over. Anna was relieved. She didn't want to look at herself.

Anna showered until the water turned cold. Stepping out, she wiped off quickly and then threw on her sweat pants and John's hoodie. She gently pulled her hair up into a messy bun. Any small moves could cause her head to ache more. Then she opened her bag and pulled out the mild sedatives the hospital had given her for sleep. Her lips twisted. The doctors had promised they were mild enough not to hurt her baby, but she still worried. Anna decided just to take one.

Going back into the bedroom, she found John sitting in a seat next to the bed working on his computer. Anna suddenly felt guilty. This weekend was supposed to be about John. He was the one who had retired from working in the Army for so many years and he was supposed to embark on his new adventure with Robert. But here he was worried about her.

"Ready for bed?" John asked her. The way he looked at her still caused her breath to hitch in her throat. But then she tensed. Her lips twisted and even more tears filled her eyes. She knew he deserved better than her.

"It's only six o'clock. Don't come to bed because of me," Anna said. She turned her bedside table off and climbed into the bed. She watched as John closed up his computer and placed it into his bag. Then he pulled a book out.

"I could read to you," he offered. It was something the two of them had enjoyed doing together. John would often read books to her as she fell asleep. Most nights she would have him repeat sections from the night before that she had missed.

"No, that's okay. I really would just like some quiet," Anna informed him. John nodded. He climbed into the bed next to her and turned off his light as well.

Unexpectedly, Anna felt uncomfortable with John next to her. She turned to her side away from him so he wouldn't notice. As much as she would love for things to be the same as they had before, they weren't.

It didn't take long for Anna to fall asleep. The sedative had taken over. While she slept, John read his book for a few hours before joining her.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

In the middle of the night, John's arm came around Anna and his hand rested on her breasts. Anna awoke abruptly to his touch. Her body tensed and she flew into a panic. Suddenly, she didn't know where she was. All she knew was that she was being touched and she didn't like it. A scream left her lips, as she pushed the arm off her and jumped out of the bed.

"Anna," John said, waking worriedly. His eyes slowly adjusted to the darkness to see Anna pushed up against the wall with her arms protectively around her frame. Tears were streaming down her face. She appeared unaware of where she was. Panic covered her features. He sat up swiftly.

Cautiously, he reached out to her. Anna shook her head sharply.

"No!" She screamed again.

"Anna, my darling. It's only me, John," Anna's breaths were fast and John worried she would cause herself to pass out. "Please calm down."

John stood up gingerly. "It's only me," he repeated. Anna's eyes finally meet his eyes. It was then that she registered that she was safe and with her husband. A loud sob escaped Anna's lips.

"I…I'm sorry," she cried. "I don't know…." With a sigh of worry for his wife, John pulled her into his arms. The distressing sobs broke his heart. Anger filled John's frame. All he could think about was how he wanted to murder the man that had done this to his Anna.

"Shh, it's alright. Let me go and get you some water," he soothed, guiding her back to the bed.

"No," Anna shook her head. "Please don't leave me."

"I won't," he promised. "Did you have a nightmare?" He watched as Anna's eyes fell to her hands and she pulled her bottom lip between her teeth. "Anna? What happened?" John could tell that Anna was trying to decide if she should tell him. "Darling, you can tell me anything. Is it the baby? Do I need to call Sybil?"

"No, it's not the baby." Anna's eyes slowly rose up to meet his. "In…in your sleep you…your arm came around my body and your hand was touching my breast. I…it scared me." Anna's eyes jerked back down to her hands. She knew she was breaking his heart by being frightened of his touch.

"Oh, Anna. I am so sorry, I never meant…"

"I know," Anna replied quickly. "I'm sorry," her lower lip trembled. "You did nothing wrong and I…."

"You also did nothing wrong, Anna," he told her strongly. Anna began to anxiously bite on the side of her thumb. John could tell she didn't believe him; it broke his heart. He didn't know how to reassure her that she was innocent in all of this.

"I will sleep in the other guest room," John stated.

"No, please stay with me," Anna was terrified of being alone. It was written all over her face. "I…I'll be okay."

"You're not okay," John wasn't going to allow her to do something that made her uncomfortable. "I can sleep on the floor."

"No. I…I'll sleep on the floor. You…"

"Anna, you and I both know that I won't let you sleep on the floor," John told her with a small chuckle. A small smile spread on Anna's lips.

"No. I just feel bad…"

"I have slept in worse situations in the Army. The floor here is a luxury." Anna just nodded. John went to the closet to pull out the extra blankets and pillows Mary had told him were in there. He made a pallet for himself.

"Will…will you read to me as I fall back asleep?" Anna questioned him. John nodded. He sat down on the edge of the bed and began to read the book. After just a page, he looked up to see Anna back asleep. His heart felt heavy. Placing the book on the bedside table, John stood. He decided to go and get himself a glass of water. Sleep would be eluding him for a while after being awoken by his wife in such a panic.

When John reached the kitchen, he was surprised to find Mary sitting at her island sipping on some tea.

"It's one in the morning," John told her, his head tilting to the side. "Is everything alright?"

"Yes," Mary replied. "George had a nightmare. I couldn't go back to sleep. I kept thinking about Anna."

"When I think about that man, I want to murder," John said, his jaw tightening. Green hadn't just hurt his wife physically; he had left her with emotional scars that would take much longer to heal.

"Well, you are free to feel that way, but you can't act on it," Mary said. "And you definitely cannot tell Anna that. She has enough of her mind. She doesn't need to manage your feelings, as well." John nodded.

"Spoken like a true psychologist," John told her jokingly. Mary rolled her eyes.

"I did train in the field. I was going to be one before Matthew and I married and began our condo empire here," she simply said.

"I know." John still had trouble wrapping his mind around Mary helping people and giving them advice. Her personality did not lead one to believe she would care much about what other people thought. "Perhaps you could use some of your skills on your relationship with your sister, Edith."

"Edith and I get along quite well."

"Yes, now that she has placed an ocean between the two of you." Mary shrugged.

Mary stood up and placed her cup into the sink. "I am serious, John. Don't go around talking about murdering that man. Anna is the type of person to worry more about you and your feelings than her own. That will only hinder her progress. Goodnight."

_To be continued...As always, let me know what you think! Thanks for reading! _


	6. Chapter 6

_Thank you guys! You can thank my daughter for an early release of this chapter. She decided waking up at 2 am was a good idea. When I realized she was not going to go back to bed, I decided I might as well finish this update. (Also, after reading this chapter can you guess what movie my kids are obsessed with at the moment, lol) Enjoy! _

**Chapter 6**

_Several Days Later_

The past week had been difficult. Anna's physical scars had begun to slowly heal, but her emotional ones were growing deeper. It appeared every day that she was emotionally getting worse. The smallest thing could set her into a fit of tears or anger. She was also frightened all the time. Alex Green was still out there somewhere. The police guessed he realized they had a lot of evidence on him and had tried to disappear.

"I…I want to go to the station and give the rest of my testimony," Anna said, her hand wringing anxiously around her wrist.

"Okay, we'll go tomorrow, as soon as I'm back from work." Tomorrow John would be going in for his first day at work with Robert. He would only be going in for a few hours. With Anna how she was, John didn't want to leave her longer than necessary.

"No, I…I want to go now," Anna told him strongly.

"Anna, today is the last day of rest. Doctor's orders."

"But I'm tired of just laying here!" Anna yelled. Her hands began to shake.

"I know, my darling," John calmly replied. "Just one more day."

"But maybe if I tell them more information they can find him," Anna frantically said. John's jaw tightened. He hated that his wife was living in this shadow of fear.

"The police are looking for him, Anna. Nothing you say will change how quickly they can find him." Anna sighed. Her top lip came between her teeth and she shook her head.

"I…I don't know who I am anymore, John. I am scared all the time. I can't let you touch me in certain ways; I can't control my emotions. I just….." Her words faded. Sobs escaped her lips and John pulled her close.

"Have you thought about what Sybil said about seeing someone to talk to?" John suggested, after Anna's sobs had calmed down some. Anna shook her head.

"No. I don't think I can talk about it," she confessed.

"I think it could be a good idea to try," John told her. He placed his finger gently under her chin and lifted her head up so he could look in her eyes. "Will you at least think about it, for me?"

Anna nodded. "Okay. I'll think about it."

Anna grabbed the remote and turned on an old episode of the reality show _Dance Moms. _John loudly sighed.

"Anna, you know I would do anything for you, but I cannot watch this. You're supposed to watch limited television right now and you're choosing this angry screeching of a show?" Anna shrugged.

"It is awful, but I always wanted to be a dancer. I love to watch them dance, but only the original seasons," she added. John chuckled. "Team Maddie or Chloe?" Anna asked him, raising her eyebrow slightly. There were these rare moments where his wife came out from the shell. These moments gave him some hope that they would one day come through to the other side.

"I don't watch this nonsense you call television," he told her playfully. "I also don't judge children against each other-neither do you, so what you're really asking is Team Melissa or Christi." A smile spread on Anna's lips.

"See, you do watch."

"Only snippets when you are," he said, bending down to press a kiss at her forehead. He was grateful when she didn't tense. Anna maneuvered herself so that her head was resting on John's chest and her body relaxed into his.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_The Next Day _

"John!" Mary called out to him, as he headed to the door. He had been trying to quietly leave for work. The night had been long. Anna had been unable to sleep and her fears had consumed her. Because of that, John had gotten very little sleep and was running late this particular morning.

"Yes, Mary?" He asked, trying not to sound impatient. Mary walked to him and sighed.

"I have been thinking about that conversation we had a few days ago. I may have been a bit harsh," Mary explained.

"No, you were right. Anna needs the focus to be on her." His eyes glanced up at the clock. He had promised Robert he would be in at 9. That was in ten minutes.

"I know I was right," Mary replied bluntly. John's eyebrows rose. What else should he have expected from Mary? "But what I wanted to add is that your feelings are valid too. Speaking to someone and talking through those feelings could prove helpful."

"Perhaps," John agreed.

"When I was in training, there was this girl who was raped by her boyfriend's best friend. The friend was never charged, because they couldn't find enough evidence. The boyfriend could not let it go. The poor girl was always so terrified he would go and kill him. Her feelings and pain were placed on the back burner," Mary paused. Her eyes fell to her hands. "She tried to kill herself a few months after it all happened." Her eyes came back up to John's. "It was unfair of me to compare you to that situation."

"It's fine."

"I know you love Anna; this guy loved his girlfriend too. His emotions just took over. We tried to convince him to speak to someone; he wouldn't." Mary gave John a small smile. "Sorry, I didn't mean to get into all of that. I had just wanted to add that your feelings are valid."

"Thank you, Mary." John began to turn to head back to the door. He paused, "What ever happened to the girl?" Mary's shoulders shrugged and he noted the way her features fell.

"I don't know. They moved away. I think about her often." John had known Mary for many years, but this was the first time he had noticed that softness in her that Anna always spoke about to him. Mary shook her head and adjusted her features. "Anyway, you should probably get going. Tell my father we said hello."

John gave Mary a nod, before exiting the house. His eyes glanced over toward the guest house. The sight of it caused his blood to begin to boil again. Forgetting that he was running late, John walked over to the house. His hand grabbed the handle and he turned the knob. Unsurprisingly, it was locked. That was probably for the best. He didn't need to look in the room where his wife had been viciously attacked.

Mary's suggestion of him talking to someone wasn't the worst idea. Anger and defeat both consumed him most of the day. He needed to get some control over those emotions so that he could help Anna. Watching her struggle daily tore him apart. He wanted nothing more than to fix everything for her. Not being able to do that made him feel like an incompetent spouse.

When he arrived at the office, John tried to shake all of his thoughts away. He was immediately welcomed by both Tom and Robert.

"So glad you are ready to start this journey with us!" Tom told John.

"How is Anna?" Robert asked quietly. Even though he had wanted to keep Anna's attack under the radar, he had needed to inform both Robert and Tom. The two of them were going to be his partners and he needed them to know why he wouldn't be able to go all the way in right away.

"Not well," John answered honestly. "I know I am just starting, but today I can only do the start-up paper work. Then I need to get back to her."

"It's no problem. Come on into our office."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Anna awoke feeling famished. She rolled onto her back, sighing when a pain shot up through her legs. Tears began to form in her eyes. The pain was still unbearable at times. Sitting up, she looked down at the floor and remembered that John was going into the office this morning.

Her lips twisted in thought. She no longer had to remain in bed and needed to rest. Her concussion should be healed by now, in theory anyway. Braiding her hair into a simple side braid, she stepped out of the bed.

Her hand lingered on the door knob. Over the course of the past several days, she had remained between the bedroom and bathroom. There was nothing outside of that door that would hurt her. Mary was her oldest friend.

Taking a deep breath, she opened the door and slowly walked into the hallway. Gradual steps took her into the living room, where Mary was sitting on the couch with George watching the movie _Frozen. _

"Anna," Mary said, pleasantly surprised.

"Aunt Anna!" George added. When he saw her face, his eyes grew concerned. "What happened to your face?"

"Um…."

"She got hurt, so we need to be extra careful," Mary answered for her.

"Oh, okay. Want to watch Olaf with us? He's a silly snowman!" Anna was thankful for the innocence of a child.

"Sure," Anna stated, taking a seat next to them on the couch.

"Do you like Olaf? Or Elsa? Or Anna? Her name is kind of like yours, but she's Ah-nah and you are Ann-ah."

"George, leave her alone and watch your movie."

"No, it's okay," Anna said with a soft smile. "It's kind of nice to talk to someone who doesn't know and so they don't treat me differently." Then she turned her attention to George. "I don't know. I haven't seen this movie."

"Lucky you," Mary said. "Sybbie has been obsessed with it since she was two. Then she got Lilly, Marigold, and George into it. It's been four years of this obsession. It tends to fade out every now and then, but then it pops back up again. It's like a cold sore." Anna chuckled. Her hands found their way to her still flat abdomen and she wondered if she would be watching this same film with her little one in a few years.

Anna sighed and dropped her hands away from her stomach. She had told herself not to get attached. There were no guarantees that the baby would make it. Ever since her first miscarriage, she had told herself this. However, it never mattered what she thought or tried. She always fell deeply in love with the baby in her belly. Each loss had crushed her heart more and more. The last one in the worst way. They had made it past the elusive twelve weeks that they had never been able to make it to before. It had seemed so promising. Tears welled up in Anna's eyes. It was only a matter of time before her heart would be broken again.

She couldn't do it. She couldn't have children. Even though he said she didn't, Anna knew she had let John down. Having a child of his own was something he had always wanted. They had talked about adopting. But Anna wasn't sure she could do it. She had heard of too many stories where the birth mother changed her mind last minute. Anna wasn't sure her heart could handle that if it happened to her.

"Anna?" Mary's concerned voice brought Anna back to the living room. She glanced up and saw Mary looking at her worriedly. "Are you alright?"

"Yes," Anna lied. Mary did not appear convinced.

"Do you need to talk? We could go into the kitchen…"

"No, I'm fine," Anna cut off. "I think I am going to go shower. Can I do some laundry?"

"Absolutely."

Anna nodded a thanks and then disappeared back down the hallway. Mary sighed. She worried deeply for her friend. Anna had been wearing the same two sweatshirts and pants daily. Mary understood why. It was common for some rape victims to dress in baggie clothes to hide their body.

_Ring. Ring. _

The sound of a phone ringing drew Mary from her thoughts. She glanced over to see that Anna had left her phone on the couch. The caller ID told Mary it was a local number, so she decided to answer it for Anna.

"Hello?"

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

After her shower, Anna dug through John's bag for another hoodie. She knew he wouldn't mind. Her sweatshirts needed to be washed. Pulling a navy hoodie out of the bag, she brought it up to her nose. It smelled like John. It was comforting. Throwing it on over her t-shirt, she realized she didn't have any baggy pants left to wear. Tears burned her eyes. She didn't feel comfortable in her own skin. Looking through her bag, she found some oversized pajama pants and decided to wear those.

When she stepped back into the hallway, she was surprised to see Mary standing there as though she was waiting for her.

"I answered your phone," Mary told her, handing her phone back to her.

"Who called?"

"The police station. Alex Green has been arrested."

_To be continued..._


	7. Chapter 7

_Enjoy!_

**Chapter 7**

_One Week Later_

Anna had thought the news of Green's arrest would make her fear fade, but she still found herself terrified. She was scared all the time, even when her husband was right beside her. It was silly, really, she thought. The man who had attacked her was locked away and she had a strong husband near her to protect her. Why was she still frightened?

She sighed.

A long yawn escaped her lips and she wanted to lay back down to go back to sleep. The past few days she had been exhausted. She knew part of the reason was because of the nightmares that would awake her in the middle of the night. But she was pretty sure it was also because of the baby. Almost like it happened immediately, pregnancy symptoms had hit her all at once three days ago. She was nauseous, started vomiting, her breasts had begun to swell, and exhaustion had taken over her body. These were all good signs, Anna knew. Her hands pressed against the small swell that had seemed to grow overnight.

It was odd, she thought, to be showing so early. It was a slight swell, barely noticeable. But she saw it, the slight bulge in her normally flat stomach.

"Anna," John said, poking his head out of the bathroom. "Do you want to leave early and get some breakfast?" Anna's nose turned up at his suggestion. Food did not sound good at the moment.

"No, I'll just have some tea," she informed him. He nodded and popped back into the bathroom to begin his shower.

Anna bit her lips. Her eyes scanned her bag, as she tried to figure out what she would wear today. Even though it was October, it was hot. It was October in the south. It was practically still summer. All the clothes she had brought were for warmer weather, but she didn't want to wear shorts and a t-shirt. Her sweats, however, would look too dingy.

Pulling her sweatshirt over her head, she tried on one of her nicer tops. Looking in the mirror, her lips pierced. The swell of her breasts made the top tighter than it had been. Tears began to form in her eyes. Feeling comfortable in her own skin didn't exist anymore. She threw the sweatshirt back over her and walked out of the room to head to the kitchen.

In the kitchen, she began making herself a cup of tea. She made her traditional English tea. It was not that abomination the Southerners called Sweet Tea. When she had taken a sip of it, she had been sure her teeth would fall right out of her mouth. Was it tea or just straight sugar?

"Anna? Are you wearing that to your appointment?" Mary questioned tersely. Her eyebrows furrowed in disapproval.

"Yes, why?" Anna asked back, feeling uncomfortable. Mary shook her head and gave her a kind smile.

"You're welcome to borrow some of my clothes," Mary informed her. "I know you don't have all of your things yet from the move."

"I…" Anna's hands fell to her hands. "I don't feel comfortable in any of my clothes anymore." Mary's lips twisted.

"What if you wore some leggings and an oversized shirt? Then I could do your hair?" She offered.

"It's just an OBGYN appointment with Sybil. I don't think I need to look my best," Anna said simply.

"Okay," Mary replied. Anna took a sip of her tea and glanced at the television. One of the random morning shows was on it. Someone was showing how to make the perfect omelet. She sighed. Maybe Mary was right.

"Okay," Anna told her, meeting her eyes. "Something simple. And no make-up."

"Absolutely," Mary agreed with a smile.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

After taking nearly thirty minutes going through Mary's entire wardrobe, Anna had approved a long sleeve oversized t-shirt and some leggings that were not skin tight. She didn't want to admit it, but putting on some clothes that weren't sweats did make her feel a little bit better.

Sitting in front of Mary's mirror, Mary pulled Anna's hair back into a simple French braid. The way her hair was pulled off her face, made her features stand out more. Anna glanced up at the mirror and then abruptly looked away.

"Thank you," Anna told Mary quietly, standing up and heading out into the living room. On the couch, John was waiting for her. When he saw her, Anna could tell he was surprised to see her wearing real clothes for the first time in two weeks. He didn't, however, say anything about it. And for that, she was grateful. Anna didn't want any attention in that way anymore. It was just another thing Green had stolen from her.

John led her outside and opened the door to let her into the car. He had always done that since their very first date. He would open the door to her and then go to the other side to get into the car. She had been impressed by his chivalry.

"I was thinking we could go and look at cars after the appointment," John said, attempting some small talk on the way to Sybil's office. Anna didn't hear him, though. She was anxious about this appointment. Even though she had begun to experience the pregnancy symptoms, she didn't trust them. Anna had experienced too much heartbreak to get her hopes up too much.

"Anna?" John asked. Anna glanced over to him.

"Yes?"

"Would you like to do that?"

"Do what?" John reached over and grabbed her hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. He could tell she was nervous about the appointment.

"Look at cars," John filled in. Anna shrugged her shoulders. She didn't see the rush. Before they moved, they had sold her car. It was time for her to get a new one. They figured it would be easier to wait until they moved to get one. However, Anna wasn't sure she needed one right now. She didn't feel comfortable being on her own. What would she do with a car?

"Maybe another day," John said with a smile. They pulled up into the parking lot and Anna felt nauseous.

"I can't do it," Anna began wringing her hands nervously in front of her. "What if….."

John turned toward her and gently took both of her hands into his.

"If it's bad news, it's bad news. We can't change the outcome, but we do have each other, my darling." Anna nodded.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X

Anna sat alone on the cold surface, twiddling her thumbs. Her teeth chewed anxiously on the side of her lip, as she wondered why she was told to come back to the room alone. She trusted Sybil, but she hated being by herself right now. A shaky breath left her lips.

_Knock. Knock._

"Come in," came a feeble reply from Anna's lips. Sybil walked in and gave Anna a kind smile.

"Sorry about that," Sybil told her. "I had a small emergency. Thankfully, everything is okay now."

Anna attempted to curl her lips into a small smile.

"Before we do the ultrasound, I would like to give you a pelvic exam. This is, of course, if you'll allow it. I need to make sure you are healing okay. I will have the nurse join me, and I can also have your husband come in as well. However, I wanted that to be up to you." Anna sighed. She really didn't want any of this, but she knew the health of her baby depended on the health of herself.

"Can he come in for the ultrasound?" Anna questioned. Sybil smiled.

"Of course."

"Then I would rather him not be in for this," Anna told her.

"Before we begin, I'd like to ask you a couple of questions," Sybil said. Her smile was always so gentle, so kind. There was never any doubt of her care for others. "How are you feeling?"

Anna shrugged. "About as good as I can, I guess."

"Have you thought anymore about talking to someone?" Anna's eyes looked down at her hands and she shook her head.

"No. I…." She paused.

"There is someone I would like to recommend. Her name is Dr. Phyllis Baxter. She is highly trained in this particular field. I have her card. I can even help you set up an appointment, if you'd like." Sybil handed the card to Anna. Anna's fingers ran along the outside of the card as she sighed.

"Okay," Anna stated quietly. "I'll try."

"Good." Anna lifted her eyes back to Sybil's and saw that she was genuinely happy that Anna was going to go and speak to this woman. "Are you ready for the examination?"

Anna bit her lower lip. The true answer was no.

"It's okay if you're not. We can take this as slowly as you need me to."

"We can try," Anna offered. She hated to think of Sybil's other patients waiting longer because she couldn't handle a routine exam.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

The exam had gone by quickly and for that Anna had been thankful. She had stared in the corner of the room, trying to put herself anywhere but here. Anna had been told she could put her clothes back on for the ultrasound.

When John walked into the room, Anna was so happy to see him. Even though they had been only separated for a little while, it was been a difficult twenty minutes.

"Okay, let's see that baby," Sybil told them with a smile and a wink. Anna was told to push her pants down some and to lift her shirt. Her eyes narrowed at her stomach. It seemed to be protruding out even further than it had this morning. She was sure she was going crazy.

Sybil placed the cool gel on her belly and began to run the device on her lower abdomen.

"Remember, it's still early for an abdominal scan. If we don't see anything, we can try a transvaginal one. However, usually around 8 weeks we can sometimes see just fine with the abdominal one," Sybil said. The screen was facing Sybil so that John and Anna couldn't see anything.

As Sybil looked over the screen, her brows furrowed. Anna glanced up at John and she could tell he was just as concerned as she was at Sybil's expression.

"Is…is everything alright?" Anna questioned, her voice shaking. John grabbed her hand and gave it a tight squeeze.

"Yes," Sybil said, looking up and giving them a smile. "I just need to do some measurements first. But I'll let you hear something while I do that." Sybil pressed a button and before they knew it the loveliest sound filled the room.

"John," Anna said with relief in her voice. "That's our baby." John bent down and pressed a kiss to her forehead. The heartbeat was loud. It almost appeared like it was echoing as one heartbeat sounded like it was on top of another.

"Alright," Sybil said, turning the screen so they could see it. She placed her hand over a blob. "That is Baby A."

Anna and John smiled. Anna thought it was weird Sybil called it A. Wouldn't it be a B after Bates? However, before she could question it, Sybil's hand moved to a different blob.

"And this, is Baby B."

"Wait, what?" Anna questioned, even though she knew what Sybil was saying. Her breath hitched in her throat. _Twins? _To say she was shocked would have been an understatement.

"Oh my god," John said in his way of completely overwhelmed joy. "Two babies?"

Sybil's smile widened. "Yes. And they both appear very strong. They are actually measuring at about 9 weeks."

"So they're healthy?" Anna asked for reassurance. Her eyes couldn't leave the screen. It was plain as day. Two small little blobs. Tears filled her eyes.

"Yes," Sybil reassured her.

Anna's eyes found John's and they both smiled.

"We're having twins, John."

_To be continued..._

_I am hoping to update Volunteer before my next update of this story. Also, full disclosure...I love the abomination that is sweet tea. haha_


	8. Chapter 8

_As always, thank you!_

**Chapter 8**

_Three Weeks Later _

"Darling?" John's voice could be heard across the house calling out to find her. Anna turned glancing around the large kitchen. They had just begun looking at houses after her appointment with Sybil. Living with Mary was a fine short term solution, but eventually they would need to live in their own place. And if twins would be joining them in approximately six months, then they would need a place soon.

"Darling?" John questioned again, when he found her. Anna's hands ran across the island in the middle of the room. Then her eyes met John's and she smiled.

"I think this is it," she told him.

"Are you sure? There are still plenty…"

"Yes, this is our home, John," Anna replied, sure of her decision. The idea of having a home of their own was exciting to her. Sure they had had homes before, but those homes had always been temporary. Moving every two to three years never gave them that stability they would be getting now.

John's lips widened into a bright smile. He walked around the island to be closer to her. His arms ached to go around her in the way they used to when her back was to him, but he knew he couldn't touch her in that way. So, he walked around her frame and took her hands into his.

"Let's put in an offer," John replied.

"Yes, let's," Anna agreed with a smile. Awkwardness then sat between them as this would have been a time when they would have kissed. Anna twisted her lips and took a step back. Their lives were not their own anymore.

"I'm sorry," Anna said, her eyes falling to her hands.

"Don't apologize, Anna. You…" Anna shook her head, telling him to stop telling her not to apologize.

"I'm sorry things can't be the way they were before. I…I am trying," she added, before turning away from him. John sighed, once again feeling absolutely helpless.

"Anna…"

"I was thinking, we could put the babies in the extra bedroom that is across from the master bedroom. Then when they get older, they can have their own rooms upstairs," Anna explained, changing the subject.

"Yes, I think that's a good idea."

"Of course, that is, if these babies make it," Anna quietly said. John almost said something, but Anna turned and started walking toward the stairs. "Then we could put the maps of where all we have lived on this wall," she pointed along the side of the stairs. Her eyes glanced at her watch and she grabbed her purse that was hanging on the railing.

"I need you to take me to the restaurant to meet Elsie. I told her I would be there in half an hour," she abruptly said. The quick changing of subjects was something new that John noticed Anna would do. She tried to keep herself busy to keep from focusing on her pain or being hopeful for the babies. If any emotion began, she would just switch to something else. It worried John that she wasn't allowing herself to deal with any of it.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"When are you going to get your own car?" Elsie questioned. She grabbed her cup of coffee and brought it to her lips. Anna shrugged, before pushing her hair back behind her ears. Elsie had been begging for a lunch date for several weeks. This was the first time, Anna had felt comfortable enough to go out in public. However, now that she was here, she wasn't as sure.

"I don't know. I probably should soon. Everyone is tired of running me around," Anna said into her tea. Elsie didn't miss the way Anna's hands shook as she placed the cup of tea back down onto the table. Her eyebrows furrowed in concern.

"Anna, love, are you speaking to anyone about what happened?" Anna bit roughly on the side of her lip and tears began to form.

"I…I have an appointment tomorrow," Anna informed her. "Sybil, Mary, and John all insisted.

"Good," Elsie honestly told her. She worried for Anna's mental wellbeing. Speaking to someone could help that.

"I guess," Anna said, shaking her head. Then she bent down into her bag and pulled out a small gift for Elsie. "Here, this is for you," Anna forced a smile. Elsie took the package and gave Anna a sideways look.

"What is this all about? It's not my birthday."

"Just open it." Anna had waited until she hit twelve weeks to tell anyone about her and John having twins. Just yesterday they had had a twelve month appointment showing that both babies were growing as they should.

Elsie opened her small gift to find a small plaque that read '_The only thing better than one grandchild is two_.' It took a few reads of it for Elsie to realize not only that Anna was having twins, but that she considered her to be their grandmother. A large grin grew on her face.

"Oh, Anna. Twins?" Anna nodded. "How wonderful."

"Will you be their grandmother? And Mr. Carson their grandfather? John and I don't have any living family and you both have been such a family to us."

"Absolutely," Elsie replied. She was absolutely honored to be given such a title.

Anna smiled. She was glad to know her children would have plenty of people to love them. Better than she had had growing up. Unconsciously, she rested her hand across the noticeable bump she now had. She couldn't wait until the two of them started to move and give her reassurance that they were alright.

Out of the corner of her eye, Anna saw a familiar silhouette that made her face go pale. Across the street stood someone who looked extremely familiar to Alex Green. He was too far to know for sure. Plus, Green was arrested. It couldn't be him, could it?

"Anna?" Elsie asked concerned.

"I just though I saw…." She glanced back up and the figure was gone, so she shook her head. "I must have imagined it."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_The Next Day _

"I miss my husband," Anna finally said, breaking the silence in the room. She had been in Dr. Baxter's office for a while now. Dr. Baxter was a kind woman who had asked Anna several questions about her, but kept the questions simple to ease her into the session. Her last question had thrown Anna for a loop, 'What do you miss the most?'

"I miss being with him. Even when we are in the same room, there is this heaviness around us. He's afraid to touch me and I'm afraid to let him." A stray tear fell down her cheek. "There was this thing he used to do where he would walk behind me and then wrap his arms around my frame, holding me close. I miss those intimate moments. I can cuddle with him and watch television, but that's about it."

"It will take some time," Dr. Baxter told her.

"I don't want it to take time," Anna said, impatiently. "I just want it to be over with. I want to be back to normal, but I can't be."

"No, you can't," Dr. Baxter agreed. "And that is frustrating." Anna nodded.

"All John and I have wanted is a baby. We had several losses. Now we're pregnant with twins. It feels like Life has played a cruel joke on us. This should be the happiest time in our life, but I am too spoiled to enjoy any of it."

"Anna, you are not spoiled. It's a feeling many rape victims feel, but that doesn't make it true," Dr. Baxter paused. Anna wiped the tears away from her cheek. "Twins are a big undertaking."

"Yes, they are. And I'm not sure this is the best time for a baby. It's all I have ever wanted and now…." She tapered off. Her eyes glanced up at the clock. Her session would be ending soon. "What if I fail them?"

"Anna, I have something for you," Dr. Baxter told her, pulling a book off her table. She stood and handed it to Anna. Glancing over it, Anna realized it was just a simple notebook with empty pages for her to write.

"I…."

"I'd like you to use this to write down your thoughts and feelings. You can also write down any questions you have for me while we are apart. When you come back in two days, bring it with you. If you have any important questions or something happens before our next meeting, call my emergency number."

"I'm not much of a writer," Anna told her, furrowing her brows.

"Just try it for a few days. You may find it helpful to have a safe space for your feelings."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

The Talbot house was loud. That was Anna's first thought when she walked through the front door. An uber had taken her home from her first appointment with Dr. Baxter. John had offered to pick her up, but Anna couldn't keep pulling him away from his work.

When little Lilly Branson ran in front of Anna to be followed by Marigold and George, Anna remembered that Edith was in town visiting. They were having a family dinner at the Talbot house tonight. Edith and her family were staying at Sybil's, but Mary's house had a bigger area for them all to have dinner together.

"Oh Anna, it's so great to see you!" Edith said, walking by. Her hands rested on top of her growing belly. Anna smiled.

"Congratulations, when is your new little one due? Is Marigold excited?"

"End of December, and yes. She is thrilled." Marigold called for her mother and Edith gave Anna a small smile, before heading to check on her daughter.

Anna sighed. She wasn't in the mood to talk to the entire Crawley family tonight. John wouldn't be home for another hour.

"Anna," Mary came up beside her. "I know this may be a bit overwhelming for you. You and John can go over to Sybil's house or…" She paused. Anna knew she was about to say her guest house. Anna shook her head.

"I'll be fine. I may go and shower." Anna attempted a smile, but it fell short. She headed to the guest bedroom where she was staying and closed herself into the room.

Sitting on the bed, she pulled out the small notebook that Dr. Baxter had given her. Flipping through the pages, she let out an audible sigh. How would this help her? She threw the notebook onto the bedside table. Her head fell into her hands. Her lips twisted and her eyes glanced back over at the notebook. She sighed again, before picking it up off the table. Perhaps writing in it for a few minutes wouldn't hurt anything.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"Anna," John said quietly, gently nudging her shoulder. Groggy, Anna awoke feeling confused. Her eyes slowly adjusted to the room. When she looked at the clock, it was only 5:30. She must have fallen asleep.

"What?"

"Detective Danson is here," John informed her. Anna sat up. Detective Danson was the main detective on her case. Margaret Danson was the one who would update her on what was happening and come if they needed any new information from her.

"What does she want?" Anna questioned nervously.

"I don't know. She's waiting in the room across the hall. I thought that might be best with the dinner party going on in the kitchen and living room." Anna nodded in agreement. She quickly pulled her hair back into a messy bun and stood.

The two walked into the guest room across the hallway. Detective Danson was sitting in the chair in the corner, when they entered she stood.

"I am sorry to bother you so late in the evening. Should we sit?" Anna shook her head.

"Just tell me what's going on," Anna could tell the detective was not here with good news.

"Alright, Alex Green has been let out on bail." Anna's body ran cold and she felt John tense beside her.

"What?" John questioned angrily. Anna bit down on her lower lip.

"When?" Anna was finally able to get out. Her hands began to nervously shake.

"Bail was posted a few days ago." So she had seen Green yesterday. She had not been imagining it. Just thinking about it made her sick.

"Why didn't you tell us sooner?" Anna asked.

"I was out of town. I didn't get back until today and I just recently found out you both didn't know. He is not supposed to come near you, Anna. There are specific terms to his release before the trial, or he will be brought right back into the station."

"Not sure how much good that'll do. He didn't follow the rules before now. What makes you think he will this time?" John was seething. Anna wasn't looking at him, but she could tell just from the way he was speaking. Anna, however, only felt sick and unsafe. How was she ever supposed to heal if he was out there somewhere?

"I'm sorry, Mr. Bates, truly I am. My hands are tied in this matter."

"Thank you," Anna randomly spoke. Her voice did not feel as her own. She watched as the detective spoke a few more words and then headed out the door. Her lower lip began to tremble as the reality of it all sunk in even deeper.

"Anna, it'll be okay. I won't let him anywhere near you. You won't be left alone for a minute," John tried to speak soothing words, but Anna didn't hear any of them.

"I….I think I'm going to be sick."

_To be continued..._


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Last night, Phyllis Baxter had gotten a frantic call from Anna saying her attacker had been released on bail. Phyllis said to come in early and she would fit Anna in before her other clients came in for the day. However, they had been in the room for nearly fifteen minutes and Anna hadn't spoken. Phyllis watched as Anna sat quietly in front of her. The girl's lips were chapped and her face pale. She had her hands clasped tightly around the journal that was given to her yesterday.

"Anna, how do you feel?" Anna's lips twitched, but she still didn't speak. Her knee began to shake with anxiousness. "Anna? Do you have something in your journal you would like to share or talk about?" Anna shook her head.

Phyllis sighed.

"Anna, I know this is difficult. I know you are struggling. If you don't want to talk with you, perhaps you can write it in there. Then we can…." Her words were cut off when Anna threw the book harshly across the room.

"I don't want to write it down," Anna stated angrily. "I just want my life back."

"Anna…"

"It's not fair," Anna's voice rose slightly. "My entire life has been destroyed and he gets to walk around like nothing has happened."

"You're right. It's not fair," Dr. Baxter agreed. "He is only out on bail, Anna. He will be put on trial for what he did."

"And if they find him not guilty, what do I do then?" Her lower lip quivered and she looked away.

"We just take it one step at a time, Anna. Things won't get better overnight."

Anna closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Everything around her seemed to be falling apart. "I thought I was terrified when he was locked up," Anna told Dr. Baxter, slowly opening her eyes to meet hers. "But now…." She paused. A wave of nausea hit her hard. Phyllis noticed the look on her face and quickly handed over her waste basket. The vomit rose up Anna's throat and she was grateful for the quick response of Dr. Baxter. Empting the contents of her stomach, Anna only felt worse. She placed the basket on the floor next to her and then wiped the edges of her lips with the back of her hand.

"I'm sorry. I can go and clean it out," Anna offered.

"It's fine," Phyllis tried to offer Anna a smile, but her lips turned into a frown when she noticed how pale Anna was now looking. "Anna?"

"I'm fine," Anna told her. "I…I should probably go. You have clients coming in soon. I..Thank you for coming in early."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_Two Weeks Later_

The past two weeks had gone smoother than both Anna and John had expected. Thankfully, there had been no sign of Green. Perhaps he had taken the ruling that he was to stay away from Anna seriously. Even so, John or Mary stayed with Anna at all hours of the day. She was still terrified of being alone. Her sessions with Dr. Baxter had been increased to three times a week from two.

"I don't have to go," John told Anna. Months before they had moved, John had been invited to a football party with Henry and Tom. It was a ticketed event and it was tonight. With everything that had happened, John had forgotten until the day before when Henry mentioned it.

"No, you should go," Anna said, sighing heavily. Her hands fell unto her stomach that had grown exponentially over the past couple of weeks. Now at fourteen weeks pregnant, it was obvious to anyone who saw her that she was pregnant now. "You deserve a night out to have fun," Anna stated. "Mary has planned a fun night here with her and Sybil. The kids are staying with Robert and Cora. You'll be miserable here watching a _Pitch Perfect_ marathon."

John gently brought her closer to him and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "I kind of like the second one," he said into her hair. Anna chuckled. Then she sat up to look him in the eyes.

"Truly, John. I'll be okay. Mary and Sybil will be here." John's brows furrowed in uncertainty, but he could see the determination on her face. She wasn't going to let him miss this.

"You will call me at any time if you need me? It doesn't even have to be an emergency. It can be that you are craving an ice cream cone."

"I promise. I will call you," Anna told him.

"Alright. Then I will go," he stood and grabbed the football jersey Henry had bought him for the evening. "Apparently, it's a dress up event." Anna giggled. John was not one to dress in football attire. He enjoyed the sport, but he didn't have a favorite team.

When he pulled the jersey over his head and turned to face Anna, something hit Anna. She wasn't sure what it was. Perhaps it was how John was always concerned about her feelings first or how the jersey fit his broad shoulders, but she just felt like she needed to kiss him in that moment. She immediately stood, pulled him closer to her, and pressed her lips to his.

John was surprised, but didn't show it. He had missed this. The simple act of a kiss was not simple at all. It was an intimacy they hadn't had in a long time. His hands came up and one rested on her back and the other on the back of her head. He deepened the kiss some. A groan escaped his lips, when she gently bit his lower lip.

As they slowly pulled apart, John rested his forehead on Anna's and placed his hand lovingly on her cheek. He could see her cheeks were flushed. He ran his thumb over the redness and smiled.

"I missed that," John told her. He couldn't express how great this felt. Anna wasn't pulling away from him. She was allowing them to remain close. She was smiling. It was a brief moment where they weren't thinking of anything else but themselves. In this moment, there was no Green, no terror, just them.

"Me too," Anna agreed. She pushed her head up and caught his lips once more. This time it was just a quick peck. Then she pulled away. "I don't know what came over me, but I just knew I needed to kiss you."

"Well I am not complaining," John grinned. Anna blushed.

"Me either," she stepped back and sat back down on the guest bed in Mary's house. It wouldn't be too much longer before they would finally be moving into their new house. As appreciative as they were to Mary, they were ready for their own place.

"I know I can't do more," Anna said, glancing down at her hands. "But, I do hope that we can one day."

"I know," John stated. "Are you sure you'll be okay this evening? I can still cancel."

"I'll be fine. I think you are trying to get out of wearing that jersey in public," Anna teased.

"Me? Never," he joked back.

X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

For as long as Anna had known Mary, she had learned Mary liked to throw a party. It didn't matter how big or small the guest list was; Mary would go all out. Tonight it was just going to be the three of them, but the house was decked out with all _Pitch Perfect_ themed decorations and foods. Anna wasn't even sure when she had gotten it all done. Just an hour ago, the house hadn't been decorated.

"Here's your shirt," Mary told her, throwing a black shirt her way. Anna opened it to see it said, 'Yeah, no, don't put me down for cardio.'

"Or," Mary added, "You can have this 'Aca-scuse- me' one."

"I like the cardio one. It's my favorite line," Anna told her. She went into the bathroom to change shirts. While in the bathroom, she heard the front door open. Peeking her head out, she saw Sybil had arrived. She walked out and Sybil immediately walked to Anna and placed her hands over her belly.

"So, how are we feeling today?"

"Fine. The second trimester is definitely easier than the first. It's just…" Anna paused.

"Just what?"

"I feel like they are trying to escape. I have a lot of pressure pushing down," Anna told her. Sybil's eyebrows furrowed, as her lips twisted in thought.

"It's probably nothing, but come by tomorrow and let me have a look, okay?" Sybil said. Then she added, "Just to be sure."

"Okay."

"Are we starting with the first one or the second one? I rather prefer the second one," Mary stated, pulling up the movie titles on her television.

"We have to watch them in order," Sybil argued. "And movie three is goofy, but I love it."

Mary rolled her eyes. "The third one is not good at all. We should just watch the second. Do you really think we'll make it through all three in one night?"

"I like the first one," Anna told them. Mary sighed.

"Fine, we'll start with the first one."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

John hadn't had a night with the guys in a long time. In many ways, he missed his Army buddies. They understood him and the life he had lived. However, both Tom and Henry were great guys. It had been kind of them to invite him to this special event at the bar. Everyone was dressed in sports apparel, so John was glad Henry had insisted he needed to wear his jersey. It added to the fun of the evening.

They had been able to secure a table in a somewhat quiet corner. Quiet being a relative term. The place was packed with guests, all of whom, were excited about the evening's game. Tom got up to get them some beers, leaving Henry and John alone. It was then that John realized he had never been with Henry alone.

"Will you need help moving into your new home next weekend?" John shook his head.

"A moving company will bring in the heavy things. I believe Mary and Sybil told Anna they would help her organize all of the little things."

"Here," Tom said, handing them both a beer. "Enjoy those. The line is starting to grow. Not sure how often we'll be able to get more." John nodded. His cheerful demeanor, however, quickly faded.

"Wait, isn't that….?" Henry stated, his eyes directly where John's were. His body grew warm and hands began to clinch into fists.

"It's Alex Green," John confirmed.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Anna felt off. She awkwardly stood and went into the kitchen to grab some water. Sounds of Sybil and Mary singing along to _Party in the USA_ did make her chuckle to herself. Seeing Mary, the usually uptight sister, playing karaoke with the movie had added a fun element to the evening.

Stepping into the bathroom, she pressed her forehead against the wall. She should probably call John. No. She knew he deserved a fun night. Everything lately had been about her and her feelings. He needed one night that was about him. She pulled her pants over her growing stomach and sat down on the toilet.

Standing, she went to flush the toilet, but she paused. Drops of red filled the water.

"_No, no, no_," she whispered frantically.

In shock, Anna flushed the toilet and washed her hands. Pushing the door open, she slowly made her way back into the living room, where Mary and Sybil were laughing at one of Fat Amy's jokes.

"Anna?" Mary stated, worriedly, seeing Anna's ashen face. Sybil turned.

"Anna, what's wrong?" Sybil asked. Anna could feel the tears starting to flow down her cheeks.

"I…I'm bleeding. Please, Sybil," she begged. "I…I can't go through this again."

_To be continued..._

_Sorry, kind of, for a short chapter with two cliff hangers. I will try to update soon! Thank you! Let me know what you think! _


	10. Chapter 10

_Thank you all! Enjoy! _

**Chapter 10**

Henry Talbot was about to say something to John about Alex Green, when he realized John had already gotten out of his chair and was heading that way. His face blanched.

"We should stop him," Tom stated loudly over the chattering voices in the bar. All Henry could do was nod. The two quickly jumped up to follow John. He was quick, though, and slipped through a small opening. The small opening closed leaving Tom and Henry temporarily blocked.

"This isn't good," Henry told Tom. "We have to figure out a way to get John out of the building."

"Yeah," Tom agreed, he found a way through the crowd and saw that John was standing right behind Alex Green. He glanced back to see Henry had also found a way through and was just a few steps behind him.

"John," Tom breathed heavily, his heart was pounding in his chest. He knew this could go bad very quickly. John ignored him. Looking at John, Tom could tell he was seething. His hands were curved into fists and his face had gone red. "JOHN!" This time he pulled on John's shoulder. "We have to go. He's not worth it."

At Tom's voice, Alex Green turned around. He seemed unfazed by the three men standing behind him.

"Can I help you guys?" He questioned. Even the way he spoke was slimy, Henry observed.

"No, we're just leaving," Tom told him. He was trying to pull John back. "We need to go."

"You raped and beat up my wife," John took another step closer to Green. Green just smirked.

"I don't know who you are, but you are clearly mistaken," he stated calmly. Green then turned around and grabbed his beer.

"You know exactly who I am," John nearly growled. "Now turn yourself back around to face me and stop being a coward."

Green's shoulders shrugged and he ignored John. His attention moved to his friend, who was sitting next to him. Henry tried to take this moment to convince John to leave.

"I'm not leaving," John stated strongly. "I did nothing wrong. He _should_ leave."

Once more, Green spun his chair around to face John. He looked completely calm about this entire scene unfolding behind him. Tom noted that he appeared arrogant.

"I don't know what your problem is, man. I'm just here to enjoy the game," Green said. John's patience ended and he grabbed Green by his shoulders, standing him up and pushing his body back against the bar.

Nearly the entire bar, or at least everyone standing nearby, went silent. Green only smiled.

"Oh yes, I remember you," Green stated eerily calm. "Your wife is a blonde little thing. British, if I recall correctly." John pushed Green's back harder against the bar. "I don't know why she's lying to you. She and I had fun." John's hands tightened around Green's collar. He wanted to drag him outside and take care of his mouth.

"Hey! Hey!" The bartender yelled, seeing the interaction going down.

"John, getting in trouble now won't help Anna," Tom tried to reason with him. John sighed and his hands slacked, making Green drop back into his chair.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"Okay, Anna, don't panic," Sybil told her calmly. "Bleeding does not always mean you'll lose the babies. It can be something else."

"But this…this is how it's always started for me," Anna cried. She was trying to stay strong, but her entire frame was shaking with fear. This was all too familiar.

"Should we take her to the hospital?" Mary questioned. Sybil shook her head.

"The ER will take too long. We can go to my practice." Sybil took Anna's hands into hers. "Listen, we're going to go to my office. There we will do an ultrasound and some tests to check on the babies okay? See if there's something causing this or something we can do."

Anna meekly nodded. The hope she had for her children's survival was fading from her body.

"J…John…"

"I'll call him, let's get you into the car."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"We're going to get out of here," Henry told the bartender, raising his hands up in surrender. "He had a hand on John's shoulder and began to pull him backwards.

"Do you want to know how she screamed?" Green taunted. John shrugged away from Henry's hand and started back toward Green. However, shocking both Henry and him, Tom was the one who punched him square in the jaw.

"You're a son of a bitch, you know that?" Tom said to Green. Henry was now trying to pull both John and Tom backwards. Tom turned away to leave and ignored the bartender yelling at them. He was thrown off when he felt his phone ringing in his pocket.

"Sybil?"

"Where are you guys? None of you are picking up your phones. You need to bring John to my office _now_. It's Anna and the babies." Tom's face fell. He turned back to see John staring at Green with his hands formed into fists at his side. They needed to leave now before the cops were called.

"John," Tom said, pulling him away. "We have to go. It's Anna." At his wife's name, John's face turned to worry. He looked at Tom.

"What…what's wrong with Anna?"

"I don't know. We have to go now."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X

Anna sat with Mary in the cold waiting room of Sybil's practice, while she ran around trying to turn on lights and set up the equipment. Anna's hands turned anxiously within her lap. She wanted John to be here. She could not do this again without him. Why had she allowed him to go outside tonight? She had been wrong. She wasn't ready.

"Alright, everything is set up. Let's go back into the room and look at the babies," Sybil offered.

"But…but John," Anna said, her eyes searching outside for headlights pulling into the parking lot. Anna wasn't sure she could hear her babies had died without him by her side.

"We can wait," Sybil kindly offered. "When I last spoke with Tom, they were back on this side of the island. It should only be a few more minutes." Anna nodded.

Finally, a car pulled in front of the front door. John ran into the building. His eyes frantically searched for Anna, when they found her, he want to her side.

"What's wrong, love?" Anna could only shake her head.

Tom and Henry walked in a few seconds later.

"Tom? What happened to your hand?" Mary questioned, taking her brother-in-law's hand and noticing the cuts on his knuckles.

"I'll explain later," he said. He sheepishly glanced up at his wife who sighed and narrowed her eyes. "I promise. It's nothing. Go help Anna."

Sybil led John and Anna back into the room, leaving Tom, Henry, and Mary in the waiting room.

"Lie down and pull up your shirt," Sybil instructed. She took a seat next to where Anna was lying. Taking the wand, she placed it on Anna's lower abdomen. Anna watched Sybil carefully. Sybil's eyes were on the screen in front of her and she kept moving the wand from one side to the other. While it was only a minute or two, it felt like a lifetime waiting for Sybil to tell them something.

Sybil turned to them and gave them a smile. Before saying anything, she turned the monitor toward them.

"Both babies still have very strong heartbeats," Sybil said. She turned the sound on and the sound filled the room.

"So…so they are okay?" Anna questioned cautiously. Sybil nodded.

"They appear perfectly healthy."

"Oh, thank god," John breathed, squeezing Anna's hand.

"Then why…"

"I am not sure. If it is alright with you, I would like to do an examination to see if we can determine where the bleeding is coming from. I may even need to do a transvaginal ultrasound. Is that okay?"

"Y…yes. Can…can John stay?"

"Of course," Sybil said with a smile. "Before we start, I did see something. It's a bit early to tell, but sometimes around fourteen weeks we can tell these things."

"See what?" Anna questioned, her concern growing again.

"I know the sex of one of your babies. Would you both like to know?" Anna glanced up at John. He gave her a gentle smile.

"That's up to you, my darling." Anna's lips twisted. She had never been given that option before. They had not made it this far. And with her last loss, they offered to tell her, but she refused to know.

"I…." Anna paused. "Yes. I want to know."

"Baby A," Sybil started, "is a boy."

_To be continued..._

_Want more? Have questions? Liked it? Please let me know! _


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Sybil finished up the examinations and told Anna she could get dressed. She told them she would be right back, but needed to grab a few things from another room. The lack of information from Sybil frightened Anna. What was she keeping from them?

"Anna," John soothingly stated, "It's going to be alright." He could see the tension in her shoulders and worry etched upon her features. John placed his hand lovingly on her shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. Anna attempted a small smile, but failed.

"Alright," Sybil said, stepping back into the small room with a box in her hand. "I did find something, but it's a good thing that I found it now," she informed them. "You have an incompetent cervix, Anna."

Anna's eyes narrowed. "A what? What does that mean?" Whatever it is did not sound good at all. Her hands fanned out protectively over her abdomen.

"It can cause preterm delivery," Sybil stated. "However," she added quickly, "Since we know this now, we can do things to help prevent the babies from coming out before they are ready."

"Like what?" John questioned. He was trying to stay strong for his wife's sake, but hearing there was a chance of preterm labor did worry him.

"You can usually start to see signs of an incompetent cervix around fourteen weeks. I will monitor you closely weekly, for a while. Anna, you will need to cut out any type of intense activity. No heavy lifting. You aren't on bedrest, not yet anyway. You can go on as normal, but as far as getting your new house ready, you'll have to leave that up to John, Mary, and me. You can sit and boss us around," Sybil added with a chuckle.

"Is there anything else I can do?" Sybil nodded. She handed Anna the box.

"This is progesterone. You will insert that daily. This box should last you for a week. I will put in a prescription for more."

"And everything should be fine?" Anna asked. Fear was consuming her. She couldn't lose these babies, not after everything.

"Yes," Sybil told her strongly. "Medicine is an amazing thing, Anna. Had this happened, say fifty years ago, the outcome may not have been as good. I will see you back here on Friday. You know you can call if there are any issues before then."

Anna's hands clutched the box in her hands. This small box was supposed to help and keep her babies safe. Odd, it seemed, that something so small could be so powerful.

"Any more questions?"

"Did you happen to see any signs of what baby B might be?" John asked, with a twinkle in his eye. Anna wasn't sure why, but John's question made her laugh. Sybil did as well and shook her head.

"No, baby B is being a bit stubborn. It is still early. We can probably tell in about two weeks _if_ it'll let us. Baby A was just ready to reveal himself early."

"That's my boy," John chuckled, bending down to kiss Anna on the forehead.

"Our boy," Anna corrected. John smiled at her.

"Yes, _our_ boy."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

After the long night, Sybil was glad to be getting into bed. However, she still had some questions for her husband. As she climbed into their bed, she quickly took his hand and glanced over it. The knuckles were covered in cuts; bruises were beginning to form.

"So, are you going to tell me what this is all about? Did you guys get into a fist fight with someone who was there for the opposing team?" Tom sighed at Sybil's question and pulled his hand away.

"No, nothing like that," he stated.

"Tom, you have to tell me. I can't believe you would…."

"Alex Green was there," Tom informed her, cutting Sybil off. Sybil's eyes widened and her jaw dropped.

"But surely you didn't go over and bother him. That wasn't smart," Sybil stated. "He's a dangerous person, Tom."

"Yes, I know, love. I didn't go over to him. John did," Sybil gasped.

"What did he do? Oh, Tom, did he do something stupid?"

"He wanted to," Tom said. "Henry and I were trying to pull him away. He did grab him by the shirt, but I was able to convince him to let him go." Sybil grabbed his marked hand again and ran her fingers over the signs that more than that had happened. Tom flinched, but he didn't pull away.

"And this?" Sybil asked, once more. Her eyes watched him carefully. Tom's shoulders sagged and he sighed.

"I should have done anything, but that…that prick is so arrogant. He called out to John, 'Do you want to know how she screamed?' and I lost it. I punched him and called him a son of a bitch," Tom finally confessed. "I know I shouldn't have gotten involved, but you should have heard him Sybil. He was talking so nonchalant about what he did. I don't think…."

Before Tom could finish his sentence, Sybil had smashed her lips into his. She pulled him down and deepened their kiss. When they pulled away, she gave Tom the brightest smile.

"You did the right thing. I would have done the same," Sybil told him. Her hand caressed his cheek. "It was better you than John. John wouldn't have been able to stop himself with one quick punch to the jaw. And that would have hurt Anna, because if he went away, Anna couldn't handle that on top of everything. You're a good man, Mr. Branson." Tom's finger ran along the side of Sybil's jaw.

"Can you show me, Dr. Branson?"

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Walking into the guest room, Anna felt her eyes growing tired. The evening had been a long one. She was glad her babies were doing well, for now, and prayed that they stayed that way. She could feel John standing a foot or two behind her. Anna ached for his arms to come around her like they used to, but she wasn't sure how to ask for it. She needed his touch.

"Will..will you hold me?" She finally asked, her eyes meeting his in the mirror. In his eyes, she could tell he was excited by the prospect of being close to her. However, he didn't understand what she was asking for, because he started to walk around her so he could hug her.

"No," she interrupted. "The way you used to, when you would stand behind me." John smiled. Slowly, he brought his arms around her, placing his hands onto her growing belly.

"Mmmm," Anna murmured, resting back into his strong frame. Her hands covered his.

"A boy," John whispered, his finger caressing the curve of her abdomen. "What do you think our other one will be?" Anna shook her head.

"I don't know. What do you want it to be?"

"I honestly don't care, as long as it's healthy," John told her. "Two happy and healthy babies are all I want." Anna nodded in agreement.

"There isn't part of you that wants two boys?" John chuckled into her ear. He then pressed a kiss against her ear.

"I don't know. Two boys could be fun, but then so could a little girl. Although, a girl could be dangerous….."

Anna's eyebrow rose. "Why do you say that?"

"Because any little girl that looks like you will get whatever she wants. I won't be able to tell her no," John said into her ear.

"She could look like you," Anna pointed out. At that, John heartily laughed, pulling back to turn Anna to face him.

"Well, let's hope not."

"I think children who look like you would be the greatest blessing," Anna said, placing her hands on either side of John's face.

"I guess we will just have to wait and see." Anna nodded. A yawn then escaped her lips. "You should go to bed, my darling. Sybil said you are to rest. Doctor's orders." Before agreeing with her husband, Anna perched up on her toes so she could kiss her husband.

"Will you stay in the bed with me tonight?" She asked, as she pulled away from the kiss. Her hands were still on his cheeks. He reached one hand up to place it over hers.

"Are you sure?" His eyes searched her face for any betrayal of her words. He didn't want to do anything that would make her uncomfortable.

"Yes. I just want all of us together," she said with a smile.

Moments later, the two of them climbed into bed. Anna quickly curled into John's frame. She had missed these moments. She hated that the two of them had missed so much because of an evil man. Her lips pursed, but she shook away her thoughts. It was then that she remembered Tom's hand from earlier.

"John?" She questioned in the darkness. "What happened to Tom's hand?" Anna felt John tense beside her. He remained quiet. "John?"

"It was nothing, Anna. Just a little disagreement," John lied. He didn't like lying to his wife. However, there was no way he was going to tell her he ran into Alex Green, especially not after the night she had had.

Anna seemed to accept John's words, because a few minutes later she was snoring within his arms.

X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

John awoke just as the sun was beginning to rise. He sifted slightly so that he could be on his side facing Anna. She was still sleeping peacefully next to him. Her soft snore made him smile. It had been amazing being next to her once again. He hadn't slept well, however. The entire night he had been afraid he would accidently brush her in a way that would cause her panic. So throughout the night, his body would wake and make sure she was still okay. He figured it would take him some time to be able to sleep deeply, but he would take little sleep and being next to her over sleeping back on the floor away from her.

A murmur escaped Anna's lips and her eyes slowly fluttered open. Upon seeing her husband, Anna grinned.

"Hi," she told him, inching closer to John. Reaching over, John pushed a stray hair off of Anna's cheek.

"Our new dining set arrived at our new house two days ago," John said, with a mischievous smirk. "Robert and I put it together yesterday. I was thinking we could pick up breakfast and then go over there and eat this morning. It could be a breakfast date."

"A date sounds nice," Anna agreed. "Have you been planning this all week?"

"Maybe," John replied. His hand ran up the length of her arm, bringing about goosebumps. Anna moaned gently. She placed her free hand over his hand and gently caressed the top of his hand with her thumb.

"I missed these moments," she closed her eyes, enjoying the touch of his hand against her bare arm.

"Me too," John said. Bending over, he pressed his lips to hers. He began to pull away, but Anna protested. She deepened their kiss and brought her arm around his back, making it so that he was halfway on top of her. "The..the babies…" John objected, pulling back slightly.

"They are fine," Anna drew John's face back to hers. She happily moaned into his mouth, before slipping in her tongue. It briefly shocked John, but he recovered quickly and was happy to oblige.

"That was nice," Anna purred lying back.

"It was," John agreed. "I'm going to go and shower," he told her. "Then will you be ready to go?"

Anna nodded. John kissed her head once more, before thinking of the cold shower he was going to need.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

When John opened the door for Anna to leave Mary's house, they were both surprised to find Detective Danson standing on the other side.

"Can I come in for a moment?" The detective asked. Anna glanced to John and saw that his jaw had tightened. Her eyes narrowed. Did he know what this was about?

They walked into the living room where Mary was enjoying her morning coffee all on her own. Mary stood to leave them alone, but Anna put her hand up to stop her. At this point, Mary knew everything that was going on so she might as well hear what the detective had to say.

"I think you know why I am here today," Detective Danson told them. Anna's head shook.

"No, well…um, is there a date for the trial?" Her hands began to anxiously tap against her legs.

"No, I….it's about last night." Anna's eyes narrowed.

"What happened last night?"

"Anna, I was going to tell you, it's just…." John feebly began to explain.

"Oh, well, it seems your husband and his friends ran into Alex Green last night," Detective Danson informed Anna. Anna's face was covered in many emotions, shock being the most prominent.

"You didn't say anything…."

"Mr. Bates, I told you to stay away from Mr. Green. This is not good for the case."

"What….what happened?" Anna questioned the detective. She couldn't look at John. She was disappointed in him doing something she had specifically asked him not to do.

"There was yelling. Mr. Green was punched in the face."

"Tom," Anna said, it all now making sense. Her hands covered her face.

"I have bad news, Anna. Mr. Green has hired a lawyer, a revolting one at that. His name is Richard Carlisle. Mr. Carlisle doesn't play fair and he always crushes his opponent."

"Richard?" Mary broke into the conversation. She and he had dated briefly years ago. "Anna, he is vile."

Anna's hand covered her mouth, attempting to stifle a sob.

"Mr. Green will drop the charges, if you drop yours."

"No, Anna. I won't let him bully you. He can do whatever he wants with me," John broke in. "He needs to pay for what he did to my wife."

"He's not pressing charges against you, Mr. Bates. He is pressing them against Mr. Branson."

Anna closed her eyes. It felt as though everything was pressing down upon her. All the evidence, all the times she had spent in the detective's office going over in brutal detail about what had happened to her, and the horrible examination after it had happened, it was all for nothing. She knew Richard Carlisle. She remembered him dating Mary and how he manipulated everyone and everything around him getting what he wanted. The guy wouldn't stop. Even if Tom did get out of it, which she doubted, what would keep him from coming after the two of them next?

"I'll drop them," Anna said, lifting her head from her hands.

"Anna, no," both Mary and John objected.

"It's too late; he's won." With that, Anna got up and disappeared leaving the three of them in the living room.

_To be continued..._

_Please let me know if you'd like more and what you think!_


	12. Chapter 12

_Thank you guys, as always! _

**Chapter 12**

John uneasily watched as Anna walked away from them all. He knew she was upset with him and he didn't blame her. However, there was no chance he was going to let her drop this case, not just like that.

"If she does want to drop the case, she will need to come in and fill out some paperwork. I do hope she changes her mind," Detective Danson stated, standing up to leave. John also stood.

"She's not going to drop them," he stated, determined. "She's just shaken up." John didn't wait to escort the detective to the door. He needed to get to Anna. Mary seemed to understand, and took over the conversation with Detective Danson.

When John reached their room, he was unsurprised to see Anna pacing back and forth in front of the bed. Her body was hunched over, as if it was trying to protect itself from everything that had just happened, and her arms were hugged tightly around her small frame.

"Anna," John said, it was a plea. Anna's head just shook harshly. He took a few steps forward so that he was blocking her pacing path.

"I…I know I upset you, Anna. He was just there in the same building as me and I lost it," he tried explaining. Anna's eyes slowly moved up to meet his. John could see they were full of anger and not tears as he had been expecting.

"I asked you, John. I asked you to leave it," she said between gritted teeth. Her lower lip began to tremble.

"I know," he softly said, placing his hands gently on her shaking shoulders. "I messed up, Anna. I'm sorry."

"You can't just be sorry, John. You can't just be sorry." She brought her hands up in fist and began pounding against him. He pulled her closer, knowing her emotions were getting the better of her. "You won't listen, John. I…I asked you. I…" She paused her motions and burst into tears. John held her close.

"I know, my darling, I know," he said into her ear, allowing her to cry into his chest. Gently, he guided her to the bed, so they were both sitting down. He held her tightly, allowing her to cry out all of her frustrations.

"You know," he whispered into her hair, "I love you more than anything in this world and hurting you is the worst thing I have ever done. I…I'll never forgive myself. I should have handled myself better, thought about you and your feelings before my anger towards him." He ran his fingers through her hair and closed his eyes. Her sobs were slowing down against him. Slowly, she sat up and wiped her tears away from her cheeks.

"I…." she paused. "I just feel so defeated." John grabbed her hands into his. He drew gentle circles with his thumbs along the backs of them.

"We aren't giving up that easily, Anna. I assure you that Tom and Sybil won't want that."

"John, you don't know how bad the Richard Carlisle situation was. He was so angry at Mary when she broke up with him. He has hated the Crawley family ever since. If he can find anything to hurt anyone associated with them, he will. He won't just stop with Tom. He'll come after Sybil as well, then you and me. I don't know if I have the strength to keep fighting, John. I just want it over with. I am so tired." John's heart broke at her admission. He knew this was all taking a toll on her, but the defeat in her voice was heartbreaking. It was something he couldn't fix for her.

"Okay," he quietly stated, "But will you do one thing for me?" Anna's lips pierced together questioningly. "Will you wait until you've slept on it before you decide? I don't want you to make this big decision and then regret it in the morning. If you still want to drop the charges after you have had some time to think about it, I promise I will support whatever you decide."

"Okay," Anna agreed.

_Knock. Knock. _

"Anna? Sybil is here and would like to speak with you," Mary's voice rang through the door.

Anna and John both got up. They found Sybil sitting in the kitchen impatiently. As soon as she saw them, she stood up and offered them an anxious smile.

"So sorry to come over here like this. Tom and I want you to know that we do not want you dropping the charges against Alex Green."

"Wh..where is Tom?" Anna asked, her eyes glancing around the room, as if she might find him hiding behind a corner.

"He was taken in for some questioning," Anna's eyes widened. "But don't worry about him. They aren't arresting him. And even if they were, Tom does not regret punching him. We will deal with the consequences; you are not the one who needs to fix this."

"But Richard Carlisle…."

"Yes, he's powerful, but you have to remember the Crawley family has its resources too. My father has already begun working on his connections. Don't give up the fight for us."

Anna sighed uneasily, but she nodded. "I...I'll think on it."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_Two Weeks Later _

The past two weeks had been almost too much for Anna. She decided not to drop her charges against Alex Green and felt like she then paid dearly for that choice. Between the case against Tom and her case against Mr. Green, they were constantly bombarded by new information being leaked by Richard Carlisle. He was doing everything to defame them. Anna knew it was a tactic to get her to drop the charges and she was leaning more and more toward it each day.

This was supposed to be a happy time for her and John. She was sixteen weeks pregnant. Her belly was growing more and more each day. Just a few days ago, they had moved into their new house. But she couldn't enjoy any of it.

"I…I am so tired," was all Anna could tell Dr. Baxter.

"You can drop the charges if you want to, Anna. If this is too much for you, you have to do what is best for you and your babies," Dr. Baxter calmly told Anna. She could see the crease of worry between her eyebrows.

"I….I don't know what's best for us. If I drop them, then he is out there for the rest of our lives. I…I'm scared too," Anna confessed.

"When is the trial?"

"Two weeks," Anna responded. "It'll be two weeks before we go to trial. I think I can make it two weeks. Tom's is next week." Her face fell within her hands. "I'm so tired," she repeated.

"I know, Anna," Dr. Baxter could only offer her a kind, but worried smile.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"This is becoming too much for Anna," John told the detectives. "There must be something you can do to stop Carlisle from leaking all of these things. Certainly, that can't be allowed."

"It's not, technically, but he has his ways of getting around the rules, Mr. Bates," the detective told him. "I do wish we could make things better."

John sighed. "She's been through so much. I wish I had just let her drop this when she wanted too. Carlisle is only making things worse."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

That evening, Anna curled up into the bed and into John's arms. She pressed her head back against his chest, as he drew lazy circles against her arm.

"I'm sorry," he whispered into her ear. "I'm sorry things have gotten worse. I should have…"

"Please don't apologize, John." Anna told him. She turned so that she was facing him. Suddenly her face changed and she laughed. John's eyes narrowed in curiosity.

"Are you laughing at me?" Her laughter was contagious, because he began to giggle as well. It was the first time he had heard her laugh in a long time.

"No," she told him. She took his hand and placed it on her stomach. "Did… did you feel that?" John's brows rose and he shook his head.

"Feel what?" Anna shifted his hand, but he still didn't feel anything.

"It must not be strong enough for you to feel them," she said, "But I did. I felt our babies move." Her eyes were bright and she had a grin that reached her ears. His hand pressed a bit firmer against her belly.

"You did?" Anna nodded. John bent over and kissed her, before bringing his head down and placing two kisses against her abdomen.

"One for our boy and one for our girl," he said, before sitting back up and bringing his lips back up to hers. Just the other day, they had had an ultrasound that confirmed baby B was a girl.

"I've been thinking of names, John," Anna told him. She sheepishly bit on her lower lip and gave John the smallest smile.

"What were your thoughts?"

"Well, I looked up names that meant hope, since they have given us so much hope."

"What did you find?" His hand remained on her belly, hoping to get a feel of what Anna had felt earlier.

"I think I just like the name Hope for a girl," she told him. "It is simple and sweet and holds so much meaning." John nodded.

"Hope Bates," he tried on his tongue. "But what about a middle name?"

"I haven't come up with one yet, but we still have time."

"And for our boy?" Anna grinned.

"Kit."

"Kit? That's a bit different," then his eyes narrowed and he playfully nudged Anna's shoulders. "Like that actor from Game of Thrones? I knew you were sweet on him." Anna just giggled.

"I was never sweet on him. My eyes were only for Daenerys," she said with a wink. "Major girl crush."

"I can get behind that," John said, raising his eyebrows.

Anna just rolled her eyes and ignored him. "Kit also means hope. But it can be short for Christopher and that is your middle name. So I was thinking we could name him John Christopher Bates, Jr. but call him Kit."

"Hum," John pondered. He hadn't thought about naming any children after himself, but if that's what Anna wanted then he would oblige. His hand reached up to caress her cheek. He was grateful for a few moments of happiness within all of the drama that had unfolded over the past couple of weeks.

"Okay, Kit and Hope Bates it is."

"Do you think it's okay to name them this early?" Anna questioned, suddenly panicked. "We…it's only a week past what we made it in the past pregnancy. Maybe…" John pressed a kiss against her shoulder.

"Shhh," he murmured. "Those are two strong little ones in there, Anna. I have faith that we will be holding Kit and Hope in twenty-four weeks."

"Truly?' She questioned, her eyes full of anxiousness. John nodded.

"Truly."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"You know, you make it hard to regret breaking our engagement five years ago," Mary said, storming into Richard's office without warning. Richard had been sitting at his desk. Upon Mary's entrance he sighed heavily and stood.

"You can't be in here."

Mary ignored him and threw a file on his desk.

"What's that?"

"I'm trying to appeal to any humanity that is left in that shell of a body you have." She stated simply. Richard opened the file to see photos of Anna after the attack. He shoved them back into the file and placed it back on its desk.

"I have already seen this, Mary. I get to see all the evidence before the trial."

"Oh, so you have lost all your humanity then," Mary stated simply. Richard outwardly sighed and ran his hand angrily through his head.

"You left me, Mary."

"That has nothing to do with this, Richard, and you know that. You are going after my brother-in-law and best friend over something that happened five years ago," Mary pointed out. "And you never liked Tom, but you did like Anna. You knew her." Mary reminded her. A few unshed tears filled her eyes, but she blinked them back. "You knew her," she repeated. "She's one of the kindest people you ever met. That's what you told me. You said perhaps the world would be a better place with more people like her."

Richard's lips twisted, but he didn't reply.

"Now you're not only representing the man who beat and raped her; you are having the news post random stories you have found about her. I….I did think you were a slightly better man than this, but thank you for showing me I made the right choice." With that, Mary left.

_To be continued!_

_As always, please let me know what you think!_


	13. Chapter 13

_Thank you all for your continued support! Enjoy!_

**Chapter 13**

_One Week Later _

Anna sat anxiously at her kitchen table. She unconsciously tapped her spoon against her plate of food, staring off out at the marsh through her window. A pelican was standing in the marsh. Its wings spread out wide and they swung a few times, before settling back to its sides. A hand landed on Anna's. She glanced up to see John giving her a concerned glance.

"It's going to be okay," he told her, taking the spoon out of her hand and placing it into the sink.

"Sorry," Anna said, realizing now that she had been making an obnoxious sound.

"Don't apologize; you're nervous." Anna swallowed hard. Today was Mr. Green's case against Tom. Tom and Sybil had insisted that Anna stay home. They didn't want her to have to face Green before she had to. So now she sat, waiting anxiously, to hear back about what was happening.

"What if we went to the movies?" John suggested. It was one of Anna's favorite things to do. She would buy all of the candy and popcorn, only to eat it all before the previews were over. Usually, she would insist that John needed to go and get them more popcorn so they could eat it during the main show.

"No," Anna said, biting her lip. "I want to be here so that I know…"

"Alright," John sighed. "Well, we can go outside and walk around the neighborhood. It's a lovely day, not too hot."

Anna brought her hand to her belly and gave it a small rub. Seeing her hand on her belly, John placed his hand over hers.

"Are they moving around a lot today?" Anna nodded. She took John's hand it placed it over the movements. They were still too small for John to feel through her skin.

"I think they are just as anxious as I am," Anna stated. John stepped closer to Anna and kissed the top of her head.

"A walk could do us all some good."

"Okay."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Mary stayed several steps behind Tom, Sybil, and her parents as they left the small courtroom. The four in front of her were overjoyed. The case had been dropped. Richard Carlisle had decided to convince Alex Green to drop the case. It was very unlike him. Mary hoped to see him to thank him. When she turned a corner, she did. There he stood waiting for her.

"You were right," Carlisle said, sighing deeply. "I did…_do_ like Anna. She's a sweet girl. She doesn't deserve any of this. I don't, however, like Tom," he added sharply. "I only helped him to help Anna." Carlisle turned his head slightly, as if he wanted to say more. Mary watched him carefully; it appeared to be a bit of longing. He covered it up, quickly though and straightened himself up.

Mary nodded her head slightly. "Thank you." It was a sincere thanks. Although, this wouldn't change the stress he had added to their lives for those weeks, but it would help to change the outcome of the next few weeks.

"I am dropping Green's case. He'll have a new lawyer next week," Carlisle told her. Mary's jaw dropped. She definitely had not expected that. That was good news. Any lawyer stepping in now only had a week to prepare. Hopefully, whoever it was, was not a strong lawyer. "Good-bye, Mary."

"Good-bye." Mary watched as Richard disappeared into the crowd. She hadn't expected her talk with him a week ago to do anything. While she knew he had some humanity in him, she hadn't been sure it was enough to help him with his distaste for her family. Thankfully, he remembered how kind Anna had been to him.

Mary eventually caught up with her family and told them the good news.

"We have to tell Anna," Cora stated, "Oh Mary, I am so glad you talked some sense into him."

"Me too," Mary agreed. "I honestly didn't think he would listen, but I had to try."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_That Night_

"Do you want to watch something or go to sleep?" John questioned, as the two of them climbed into their bed. Anna shrugged her shoulders. She fluffed the pillows behind her back so she could sit up. With her ever growing belly, she was finding it harder and harder to get comfortable for bedtime.

"I don't mind, either way," she answered, then she smiled. She turned toward John and gave him a quick peck. This brought a smile to John's lips.

"What was that for?" He asked, bringing his hand up to rest on her cheek. Anna turned her face into his hand, enjoying his touch.

"I'm just relieved. I know it isn't all over yet, but Carlisle stepping out and dropping the case on Tom has calmed my nerves so much." John's smile brightened. He ran his thumb over her cheek.

"Mine too," he agreed. Slowly, he leaned in toward Anna, catching her lips into his. She moaned slightly, letting him know that he could deepen their kiss. Her hands came up behind his back and she pulled him closer.

Goosebumps covered Anna's arms when John's hand brushed the side of her breast. He paused his hands and pulled back some.

"I…is..is that…" Anna could only nod, she pressed her lips back against his. She needed this intimacy. Now John seemed a bit cautious and more concerned that he might do something too far. As they kissed, he kept his hands at his sides and made sure his kiss did not go to deep. At this, Anna sat back and gave John a small smile.

"You aren't going to hurt me, John," she told him. Her hand caressed his cheek. "I trust you." John still didn't seem sure. He shifted uneasily, bringing his body so it was lying next to hers.

Anna grabbed his hand and entangled his hands into hers, before bringing it up to her lips and kissing the side of his hand. Her free hand ran along the side of his arm, making chills go up his spine.

"Your hands would never hurt me," she said, giving him a smile.

"I don't ever want to hurt you, Anna," he agreed. He untangled their hands and ran his fingers through her blonde locks.

"You won't. I promise I will tell you if I am uncomfortable. I just want to make out with my husband for a little bit. Can we do that?" Anna's lips curled into a sly smile. She retook John's hands and placed it on top of one of her breasts. "You can touch me here; stay up top," she said, before retaking his lips into hers.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_One Week Later_

"Eighteen weeks," Sybil said with a smile. Anna was adjusting her shirt and pants so that Sybil could take a listen to the babies. John sat next to her grinning from ear to ear. Eighteen weeks was a big milestone for them. They had never made it this far. The two of them had begun discussing nursery themes and starting a diaper pile to have on hand when they arrived. Anna wouldn't let them buy anything for the babies yet, however. Her rule was that they had to make it to twenty weeks before they could get them each beds, dressers, and clothes. She wanted to make it half way first.

"Have you felt them move yet?"

"Yes, for about two weeks now. Just small movements, nothing big." Anna's hand quickly ran the length of her belly, always amazed at its growth. She couldn't believe she was growing two babies in there. Her love for them was already so strong; she couldn't imagine what it would be like when they arrived.

"They'll get bigger before you know it, until they start running out of room, of course." Sybil placed the Doppler on Anna's abdomen and began searching for the heartbeats of the babies. She quickly found the first one.

"Ah, good and strong." Anna reached over for John's hand. When she looked him in the eyes, she saw his were brimming with relieved and happy tears.

"Is that Kit or Hope?" Anna questioned, she couldn't remember how the two were positioned in her belly.

"I believe that is your boy. Last time we did an ultrasound he was positioned more on this side. Now let's find sister, shall we?" Sybil ran the Doppler to the other side of Anna's belly and ran it up and down the length of her swelled belly. "Can you push your pants down a bit more?" Anna did as she asked. Sybil's eyes narrowed.

"Sybil?" She just looked up at gave them a smile, before moving the Doppler around her abdomen searching for the second heartbeat. Anna began to feel that ominous feeling within the pit of her stomach. She squeezed John's hand and tears began to form in her eyes. Sybil pulled the Doppler off her stomach and wiped the top.

"Sybil?" She asked again, her voice breaking.

"I'm having trouble finding the second heartbeat. Twins can be tricky. I am going to go and grab the ultrasound machine and bring it in here to look at babies," she told them sweetly. "No worries, not just yet, okay?" Sybil slipped out of the room.

"John," Anna cried, sitting up and reaching out toward him. He quickly moved to her side, pulling her close into his arms.

"Shh," he murmured into her ear. "Sybil said not to worry. I bet Hope is just being a stubborn little thing like her mother." Anna sat up and peered at John.

"I'm not stubborn," she said with a small smile. Her face fell and she shook her head. "She'll be alright, won't she?" John ran his hand up and down Anna's back soothingly.

"I believe she will."

Sybil pushed the small ultrasound machine into the room and gave them both a smile.

"I bet Hope just wanted to be seen today," Sybil told the two of them, before having Anna lie back down. She placed the wand on Anna's belly and quickly found Kit.

"There's Kit," she said. She ran the wand to the other side of Anna's belly so she could find the baby girl. "There's Hope."

Anna sat up slightly to see her closely. "Is she okay? Does she have a heartbeat?" Sybil was moving the wand up a bit and then she sighed.

"Yes, good and strong too," she said giving them a smile. "She's hiding behind brother that was why I was having a hard time finding her heartbeat with the Doppler."

Anna let out the breath she hadn't known she was holding. "You're sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. Both babies look great. While I have the machine up and running, I'd like to check your cervix to see how it's progressing. Then I'll see you back in two weeks for the nice long ultrasound."

"What happens then?"

"You'll go to the ultrasound technician for that one with one of our nicer machines. He or she will measure both babies and make sure everything is growing as it should." Anna suddenly felt anxious about this upcoming ultrasound. What if they found something bad? "Stop worrying, Anna," Sybil said, reading her thoughts. "Both babies are doing well."

"I'll try," was all Anna could reply.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_Two Days Later _

Anna had been unable to sleep. She had tossed and turned all night. The babies had seemed to feel the same way. She had felt them more than ever all night long. Her hand spread over her abdomen trying to soothe herself. John was next to her still asleep. All night, she had peered at him. How could he sleep on a night like this? A few times she had even nudged him, trying to get him to awaken. At those moments, he had just turned over on his side.

"John," Anna whispered. The sun was beginning to peer over the trees. Anna looked down at John. He was still snoring. "John!" He jerked awake. Sitting up quickly, he glanced Anna over.

"Are you alright, my darling?" Concern filled his voice. He placed his hand next to Anna's on her belly to make sure the babies were okay.

"Yes, I…I just couldn't sleep," she told him. His tense body relaxed back into his pillows, keeping his hand on her abdomen.

"I'm sorry, love," he told her through a yawn. "Why didn't you wake me before?"

"I tried; you snored through all my efforts," Anna said, somewhat playfully. John gave her a crooked grin.

"Sorry," he said. "I may have taken something to help me sleep last night. I had worried I wouldn't be able to. I didn't think about…"

"It's fine," Anna replied with a sigh. She really couldn't stay upset with him. He was always one to put her needs first. She knew he honestly hadn't thought it would impact her. Another sigh left her lips. John inched himself closer to her and rested his head on her shoulder. He lifted his hand slightly to run his fingers over the bump.

"You only have to be there for your testimony, Anna. Then we can do whatever you want to do," he said. He could feel Anna tense beneath his fingertips. Slowly, he brought his hand over to hers and took it within his.

"I want to stay for the whole thing," Anna told him, strongly. "I want to see what they say about me, about him…"

"Anna," John said, unsure of her decision. "I don't think that's a good idea. It could take several days, maybe even weeks."

"I know," she replied. She unlocked hands and sat up. "I…I need…"

"Okay," John agreed. "But if at any moment you want to leave, just say the word and we'll walk right out."

"I won't," Anna strongly stated. John glanced at her worriedly. He knew these next few days were going to be hard on her.

_To be continued..._

_As always, please let me know what you think! _


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

"What do you mean I can't go in there," Anna questioned the attorney. She could feel John standing protectively behind her. His hands reached up and rested on her shoulders, before giving them a loving squeeze.

"Since you are testifying, you are only allowed in at that time. After your testimony is over, you can go in." Anna swallowed hard, but she nodded. "You should have been told this earlier," the attorney continued. Anna knew he was still talking, but she was no longer listening. They were led into a quiet room where they were welcome to stay until she and John were both called to testify. Since Green had made a comment about Anna screaming to John, Tom, and Henry, they were all being called to testify about what they heard.

"Do you need some water?" John questioned Anna, as he pulled out a seat for her to sit in. Anna just shook her head. Then she allowed her head to fall within her hands. John's hand came up to rest upon her back and he loving rubbed circles. He wished he could take all the pain away from her.

The two of them were stuck in the room for hours. As the time ticked by, Anna would pace around the small table or sitting and chew on the side of her thumb. John would try to entertain her by pulling up videos on his phone or trying to turn on the television, but Anna couldn't focus on anything other than her upcoming testimony.

A knock came at the door and they both stood. The attorney walked in and pointed for them each to sit.

"It's over," he said. Anna's eyebrows furrowed.

"Over? I haven't testified, yet. John hasn't either."

"After opening statements, he was given a plea bargain. His attorney advised him to take it and he did."

"A plea bargain?" Anna slowly asked, her hands nervously turning in her lap. "So…what does that mean?"

"Mr. Green was told if he pleaded guilty he would be given five years with chance or parole after one. The judge agreed."

"A year?" John questioned, not quite believing the simple-ness of his plea bargain.

"That's all," Anna questioned, her eyes filling with tears.

"There are other stipulations to his bargain, such as not being allowed anywhere near you and he'll be registered as a sex-offender."

"But we didn't want this. Five years with a chance of parole so soon…." John stated, still in shock. "That seems like he got off nearly Scott-free."

"I know it seems like that, but this is really a good thing. Trials like these can last for weeks and then he could have been given a Non-Guilty plea on circumstantial evidence."

"But maybe not," John said, his shock fading and being taken over by anger. "He deserves more than this. He beat and…."

"John," Anna placed her hand on his upper arm to stop him. "It's over now. Let's just go home."

John's head turned to his wife. Her lower lip was quivering, but otherwise she appeared stoic. He hated this. Green would get to move on with his life in a year and his wife would have to live with this for the rest of their lives. This will have forever changed them.

"Okay," he replied.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

When they reached their home, John attempted to pull Anna into a small hug, but she walked away from him. He watched as she disappeared into their bedroom and shut the door behind her. John wanted to follow her, but he knew that she needed her time to process all that had happened.

_Ring. Ring. _

Glancing down at his phone, John saw Mary was calling. He didn't want to do much talking, but he answered anyway.

"Hello?"

"John? Is that really it? He got a plea bargain?"

"Yes," John answered with a harsh sigh. His hand ran angrily through his hair. "That's it."

"Oh my god," Mary's voice came from the other end. "How's Anna?"

"Not well," John honestly replied. "I don't know how to fix this for her."

"You can't," Mary stated simply. "Just be there for her. Make sure she keeps going to Dr. Baxter and focus on your lives now. Focus on your job, the babies. It won't fix everything overnight, but all you can do is move forward."

He said his goodbyes to Mary and hung up the phone, before placing it on the kitchen island. Walking to the back window, he looked at the beautiful marshes. This was always where he had wanted to raise his children; where he had always planned on living the rest of their lives. But now he wasn't sure that was the best thing for Anna. Perhaps he should mention the idea of moving somewhere new; somewhere untouched by the angry shadow that was Green.

He heard the sound of their bedroom door opening. Turning his head, he saw Anna standing in the doorway with her body pressed against the frame. John walked up to his wife and pulled her into his arms. Almost immediately she burst into tears. His hand came up to her head and he pressed his face into her hair, kissing it gently. Then he just allowed her to cry.

Moments later, when she had calmed down, he led her into their living room and the two of them sat on the couch. Anna grabbed her blanket and covered it over her growing frame. Then she leaned onto John's shoulder and he wrapped his arm around her.

"I was thinking," he said into her hair. "We could move; we could go and live somewhere different." Anna sat up. Her eyes searched his face to see if he really meant what he was saying.

"No, John," Anna replied with a shake of her head. "We can't move. This has always been our dream, John. We won't let him destroy that."

"You always surprise me, you know," John said, wrapping his arm back around Anna and bringing her close.

"How so?"

"Always stronger than me," he whispered into her hair. His hand came up to rest upon her belly. "I hope they both get their mother's strength."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_Four Weeks Later _

The rays were shining into the windows shining right into John's eyes. He sighed, turning toward Anna in their bed. It was a Saturday; he was supposed to be able to sleep in today. Perhaps today was the best day to get new curtains for the house. His hand came over to touch Anna's cheek, but he realized she wasn't in the bed next to him. Sitting up, John heard the water running in the bathroom.

John slowly climbed out of their bed and headed into the bathroom. Stepping into the bathroom, he heard Anna quietly humming to herself as she washed her hair. A smile crept on his lips. While the past four weeks hadn't been easy, he had begun to see more and more of his Anna shinning out in many moments. This was one of those moments. He always enjoyed finding her humming in the shower.

He twisted his lips trying to notice the tune she was humming and soon he realized it was _Over the Rainbow. The Wizard of Oz _was Anna's favorite movie. Every year around Christmas, she would force him to watch the film.

"_Someday I'll wish upon a star and wake up where the clouds are far_…." John began to sing, startling Anna. She turned and giggled.

"You can't just come in and start singing to your pregnant wife in the shower like that," she teased. Her smile was contagious. John slipped out of his pajama pants and stepped into the shower with her.

"Sorry, my love," he said pressing a kiss against her neck. "I had just heard the loveliest sound coming from the shower and I needed to sing to it." Anna turned so she was facing John and she pushed herself up onto her toes so she could press her lips to his.

"_Where trouble melts like lemon drops; away above the chimney top; that's where you'll find me_," Anna sang playfully. Her lips twisted and she quickly grabbed John's hands. "There," she said as a firm kick pressed against her belly. It was the strongest one she had felt. It had to be strong enough for John to feel it to. The baby kicked again and John laughed.

"I felt it," he said, placing his other hand on the other side of her belly. "Keep singing, they like your voice," he encouraged.

"_Somewhere over the rainbow; Bluebirds fly; and the dreams that you dare to_…" Two strong kicks came almost instantaneously on opposite sides of Anna's belly. The two laughed heartily. "_Dream really do come true_."

"Did they both kick or just one of them?" John asked, as his hands ran over her belly. He bent down and pressed a kiss right in the middle.

"Both, I'm pretty sure. I mainly felt Kit," she said. "He sits over here," she took John's hand to lead it where Kit was positioned in her belly. "Hope likes to hide more so I don't feel her as often, but she's over here."

"You're magnificent," John told her, standing up and taking her cheeks into his hand. He pulled her close for a kiss.

"I know," Anna said in jest, before bringing his lips back into hers. Her hand bushed up against his thigh and he moaned.

"Anna," he said, gently pushing her back. "This is probably not a good idea. You're all beautiful and wet and, and…" he was finding it hard to form a cohesive sentence, as Anna's hand came up his back to cradle the back of his head.

"I'm ready," she said into his ear. "I'm ready, John." John gently placed two fingers under her chin and glanced deeply into her eyes.

"You don't have to rush for me, Anna. I will be fine," he told her, strongly. "Plus, is it even safe with your condition?"

"I'm pregnant not an invalid," Anna said.

"No," John said with a small chuckle, "The incompetent cervix."

"I already asked Sybil. It's fine." Anna's confirmation that everything would be okay made a growl nearly escape John's lips, but he controlled himself. He needed to make sure this was what she wanted.

"Are you sure this is what you want, Anna? You aren't just doing this for me?" Anna answered by kissing the special place on his neck that could always make him groan.

"Take me to the bed," she whispered into his ear. John didn't need any more assurance, as he carefully lifted Anna and lead them to their bedroom.

_To be continued.._

_As always, don't forget to drop a review to let me know what you think. This story is coming towards its ending. Probably 2-3 chapters left. _


	15. Chapter 15

_Thank you guys! This chapter has slightly mild M rating at the beginning, but all in italics. So skip over if you don't like that. It's very, very mild. Enjoy!_

**Chapter 15**

_4 Weeks Later_

John laid in bed cradling his naked, crying wife in his arms. His face still stung from the smack from her hand against his cheek. As she cried, he tried to figure out what exactly had happened. The two had been intimate for several weeks now. Had he been too excited? Said the wrong thing? One minute they were connected as one and the next Anna was panicking, screaming, and slapping him in the face. He knew she had struck in fear, not anger. It broke his heart that he had frightened her in anyway. He tried to think back on what could have triggered this break down. This was the worst he had seen her since soon after the attack.

_"Hmm," John purred in her ear, as she tore his shirt off his frame. Anna grinned, throwing the shirt onto the floor. She then grabbed at the edges of her shirt and yanked it over her head, leaving her in her only in her bra. He leaned forward slightly and gently placed his hands over her breasts. They were growing bigger as her belly grew. A happy moan left his lips, but he let her lead. He knew it was important for her to have complete control. _

_ Anna began pressing down his pants and he quickly assisted. Once his pants were thrown off, Anna led him down onto the bed. John happily obliged. _

_ "Now," she told him, guiding him into her. He kept himself up on his arms so he wouldn't squish her growing belly. His hand tucked a stray hair behind her ear before she jerked her hips making him growl. _

_ "You feel so good," he murmured, closing his eyes. Then suddenly, without warning, he felt her tense beneath him. His eyes jerked opened and his shock grew when her hand smacked him clear across the face. _

_ "No, no, no!" She screamed. "Get off me, get off me!" John immediately moved away from her and watched as her eyes grew with fear and panic. _

_ "Anna? Anna? What's happened?" He asked gently. Her eyes slowly regained focus and met his. At that moment, she burst into tears. _

"I'm sorry; I'm so sorry. I'm sorry," she kept repeating over and over. John gently brought her chin up so he could see her face.

As Anna glanced up at John, she could see the angry red mark across his cheek. Her hand reached up and she placed it gently on top, more tears flowing down her cheeks.

"I…I hurt you," she cried. John placed his hand over hers and shook his head.

"It doesn't matter," he lovingly told her.

"It does," her voice hitched in her throat. She sat up. John watched as she seemed to realize she was only in a bra. Her eyes searched for a blanket, _something_, to cover herself with. She suddenly felt so vulnerable.

Standing up, John took the blanket from the chair next to him and placed it gently over her shoulders. He tried to reach out for her, but Anna sunk down into the chair. She turned her face away from him as though she was shamed.

"Anna, you had a flashback. You…you didn't mean to hurt me." He watched as her lips quivered and she pulled the blanket tighter around her frame. "Did..did I hurt you?" He carefully asked. Anna shook her head.

"I'm tired of him having control over me, John," Anna finally said, her voice just slightly above a whisper. Her eyes were staring out the window at the sun that was slowly setting for the day. The beautiful colors in the sky were mocking her. "I…I thought I was past this particular block, but…."

"You'll never be past it, darling," John said, bending down and perching on one knee. He reached out to take her hands. "But you do get stronger, every day. It'll always be there and I wish, above everything else, that I could make it disappear." A stray tear ran down Anna's cheek and she reached up to wipe it away.

"Will you please tell me if it was something I did or said?" John peered at her carefully; he could tell she didn't want to tell him. She was afraid to hurt him. "Please, Anna. I don't ever want to frighten you again." He watched as Anna's lips pierced tightly and she appeared to be struggling to hold it together. Slowly her head turned so she was facing him.

"I…I can't," she said with shuddering breaths escaping her lips.

"Why not?" There was a pleading in his voice that he hated. He didn't want her to think he was trying to force her into telling him.

"I don't want to hurt you and make you feel like you did anything wrong," Anna admitted.

"I know, that. But something I did triggered this moment. I need to know what it was."

A small sigh left Anna's lips and her eyes shifted back to the window. It was nearly dark now. The small light from the hallway shined on Anna's features. John thought how through all of it, she was still the most beautiful woman in the world.

"You…you said, 'you feel so good,'" Anna's lip trembled viciously and tears ran heavily down her cheeks. "He…he said that when…"

"Oh Anna, I…I didn't know…" He stood up and took a seat across from her. His hand ran through his hair.

"I know," Anna cried. "That's why…why I didn't want to say anything." Once again, she burst into tears. John sat up and climbed into the small chair next to her, pulling her back into his arms.

"Shh, you don't ever have to worry about me, Anna. I am here for you. And you have to tell me these things when they happen so I know not to do it again. I don't want to hurt you."

"I….I know," Anna said between a few harsh sobs. Her hand came back up to his cheek, where the redness had begun to fade. A sharp sob left her lips.

"I'm fine."

"What if I have an attack and hit the children?" She cried, the thought suddenly hitting her. She had never been violent before, but within the panic she had lashed out at John without even realizing it.

"You won't," John said, assuredly.

"But…"

"You won't," John repeated more strongly. "How about we get some pajamas on, grab a bowl of ice cream, and watch that dreadful show with the screaming dance teacher before bed." At that, Anna laughed.

"Okay."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"I keep thinking I am getting better and then…." Anna's words faded. She began picking at the hem of her skirt with her fingers. Then she shifted slightly, the weight of her belly making her back ache.

"Then you have a set back?" Dr. Baxter questioned. Anna nodded, biting down on her lower lip.

"John is so patient and loving with me, but I worry that it's too much for him, for us."

"From what you have told me, John is a wonderful husband."

"He is," Anna agreed, tears building up in her eyes. "We're about to have two babies. What if it's all too much and I fall apart? What if I can't be a good wife to him or the children?"

"Anna, all of these feelings you are having are normal. Even parents without what the two of you have been through worry about being a good parent; a good spouse. Babies change a lot of things."

"I know," Anna said softly. "In moments like these, I wish I had a mother," Anna confessed. "I had one, but she died right after I turned eighteen." Phyllis sat up. Anna hadn't spoken about her family, outside of John, before today. She had asked, but Anna wouldn't offer anything about it. "She wasn't a great mother, but she was mine." Anna's eyes fell down to her hands where she was twisting her wedding band around her finger.

"Do you want to tell me about her?"

"She…she was a good mum, before my dad died. It was just the three of us until I turned twelve. I remember things being good, _happy_. They were happy; we were happy." Anna shook her head, as though the memories were too hard to remember. Too painful. "Then he died."

"How did he die?"

Anna sighed and looked up, "A heart attack. Mum said he was stressed with work. She always blamed that for killing him. Once he was gone, we struggled some, but we did okay. Then my mum met Don." Phyllis noticed the sourness in Anna's voice at his name and the way her lips tightened into a straight, firm line.

"Do you want to tell me about Don?"

Anna's head shook slightly. "No, not really. He wasn't a good man." Her eyes closed and she sighed heavily.

"Anna…"

"My mum never believed me. She _wouldn't_ believe me." Anna's hands began to shake harshly and she sighed heavily. "I think there must be something wrong with me. Between my stepfather, Alex Green, losing all my babies….I _must_ be wrong."

"No, Anna," Dr. Baxter stated strongly. "You're not. And soon you are going to have two babies in your arms."

Anna couldn't reply. Her eyes clouded over with fresh tears and she bent down her head. She felt like every time she began to make progress; she would fall back farther than she began.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"I should have come in sooner, months ago," John said, taking a seat across from another man. The man was older with a kind face. He perched his elbows on the table in front of him and sat up slightly.

"Well, Mr. Bates, you are here now." John slightly nodded.

"I thought I could handle my feelings on my own, my anger. I haven't," John stated. "You see my wife was attacked and raped several months ago. I thought she was doing better, but she seems to have regressed in the past couple of days."

"And you're angry?" John glanced up. Dr. Mason's face was still kind and gentle, but he could read John very easily. John nodded.

"Very angry. The guy got off with a very light sentence and when I think about him and what he did, I want to murder." His hands clinched at his sides. "That's why I am coming to you."

"Yes, I see. Do you have any other feelings you need to get off your chest?"

John sighed at this question. He did.

"I feel helpless. I can't help her…" His voice faded and his eyes peered down at his hand. He twisted his lips and glanced up. "But anger is my main feeling I need to work through."

"Okay, Mr. Bates."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_Two Weeks Later _

Anna glanced over at the clock checking the time, as she tried to finish up dinner before John got home from work. She hadn't made him dinner since they had moved into their new house. Most nights he would pick up food on the way home or make something small for them. Tonight, Anna wanted to christen their kitchen and make it fully theirs.

She knew John was worried about her, but the past two weeks of therapy had been helping her work through her most recent breakdown. They hadn't been intimate again, however. They both were two scared of how Anna might react. It made Anna mad and doubt herself. She wanted them to get back to that level that they had been to just a few weeks before. If she had been able to get there before, she could get there again.

"Something smells good," John said, sitting his brief case on the chair at the island and coming up to pull his arms around his wife. Anna stepped back into his hold and rested her head on his shoulder.

"I thought it was time for a proper meal," she told him, twisting around so she was facing him. She leaned her head up for a kiss. John happily obliged.

"Do you need my help with anything?" Anna shook her head.

"It should be done in a moment." Kissing the top of her head, John smiled. He went to grab a couple of cups and fill them with water. His eyes narrowed when he saw Anna's body tense and lean forward slightly.

"Anna," he said, stepping toward her and placing his hand on the small of her back. Anna's hands came up to the top of her belly and she rubbed over it, giving him a small smile.

"I…I think it was just something stretching," she replied, but a second later the same sensation hit her again. This time it made her groan slightly.

"Come sit down," John told her, leading her over into the living room so she could sit on the couch. "Should we call Sybil?" Anna shook her head.

"It's probably nothing," she answered, but John didn't look convinced. "I still have twelve weeks to go. Let me rest for a little bit and if it doesn't go away, we'll call Sybil." At that John nodded in agreement. He walked into the kitchen and pulled the food out of the oven. Turning off the oven and covering up the food, he grabbed a cup of water for Anna.

"John!" Anna's cry for help made his heart fall deep within his chest. He ran to her and saw her eyes full of tears.

"What…what is it?"

"I…I think my water just broke."

_To be continued..._

_Two cliffhangers for both my stories. I should probably remedy that soon. Thanks for reading! Please let me know what you think! _


	16. Chapter 16

_I know the last chapter was a little rough for the Bates, but this chapter makes up for that. :) Enjoy! _

**Chapter 16 **

Sybil walked into the triage room and gave both John and Anna kind smiles. Anna sat up, biting her lower lip.

"Your water didn't break," Sybil told her, taking a few more steps. John sighed in relief, but confusion covered Anna's features. "This happens to a lot of moms," Sybil explained, her face gentle and smile sympathetic. "In fact, it happened to me with Lilly," she added with a laugh.

"What happened?"

"It's just urine."

Anna's cheeks immediately flushed with embarrassment. Her hand came to cover her mouth and she wanted to cry. She had created all this panic and she had only wet herself.

"Oh my god," she breathed. "I…I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry," John questioned, stepping forward and placing his hand on the small of her back. He felt Anna's body shaking from the embarrassment of it all.

"Anna, it is nothing for you to apologize for. Women wet themselves all the time when they are pregnant and a lot of times they think their water broke."

"Did you?" Anna questioned, glancing up at Sybil.

"Momentarily, but I am a doctor. I figured it out pretty quickly."

Anna fell back against the bed and covered her face with her hands.

"I feel foolish," she said between her palms.

"It's really not a big deal," Sybil said, walking closer to her. "You said you were feeling some pains?" Anna nodded.

"They've disappeared now," Anna replied.

"Well, let me have a look while I'm here, just to make sure both babies are doing well. I'll have them set you up in another room so we can do an ultrasound and an exam. Okay?"

"Okay."

When Sybil walked out of the room, Anna sighed heavily. John sat down next to her on the bed and pulled her hand into his. He slowly rubbed circles over the top of her hand.

"I'm an idiot," Anna said, dropping her hands to her belly. "I made you panic all over peeing myself."

John chuckled and shook his head. "I would rather be over cautious," he assured her. His hand ran up her side and rested between her two hands. A strong kick made his hand jerk. John smiled. His eyes looked to Anna, questioning which baby just kicked his hand. Anna shrugged.

"I'm not sure. It was so close to the middle that it could be either one, really. Probably Kit, though. I feel him more often."

"My strong boy," John replied, his hand stretching over her belly. He brought it over to the side where Hope stayed and gave it a bit of a rub. "Alright my strong girl, can I get a kick from you too?" That side of Anna's belly remained calm. John bent down so that his lips were barely touching Anna's belly. "Hope," upon saying her name, a kick nearly hit John in his face. A loud giggle left Anna's lips and she reached her hand down to where Hope had kicked to feel several kicks continue.

"I think she was sleeping and is angry you woke her up," Anna teased. John just smiled.

Bending over, John pressed a kiss to the top of Anna's head. "Well, I'm sure she and her brother will pay us back handsomely when they are born." Anna nodded.

"Are you truly not mad at me for this?" She questioned. John met her eyes and could see they were filled with worry. He shook his head.

"My darling, you didn't know. And I would much rather be in a panic and it ends up being nothing," he assured her. His hand came up to rest on her cheek, before meeting her lips with his. "You're perfect," he told her. "They are perfect. I couldn't ask for more."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"Everything looks wonderful, Anna," Sybil told her as she told Anna to sit up. "I think either you were feeling some ligament pain or Braxton hicks. These babies just need to make it eight more weeks. 36 weeks is our goal." Anna nodded. Sybil had gone over the plan with Anna many times. At 36 weeks, they would likely induce or order a C-section. Anna wanted to have the babies vaginally, but Sybil told her it would depend on the position of both babies.

"Yes," Anna answered. "Thank you, Sybil."

"Does she need to take it easy or stay in bed?" Jon questioned; Anna sighed. He was ever the worrier.

"No, she and the babies are in great health," Sybil assured him. "Will I see you both for dinner at Mama and Papa's tonight?" She questioned, as she got up to grab her paperwork.

"Yes," Anna replied.

"Good, see you then," Sybil gave them both a smile, before heading to her next patient. John wrapped his arms around Anna and pressed a kiss to her head.

"You're amazing."

"Be careful, Mr. Bates, or you'll inflate my head." John pulled back and looked at her, as though he was studying her carefully.

"Happy to report that your head is the same size as when I married you. I have yet to change its size." Anna reached out and playfully smacked his shoulder.

"Alright, you. That's enough. Let's go get some ice cream," she said, the thought suddenly occurring to her. Her lips curled into a gleeful smile. "Somewhere with lots of flavors," she added with a happy moan.

"Whatever you wish."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_6 Weeks Later_

Anna was exactly two weeks from her induction date. Feeling almost like a whale, she slowly made her way across the kitchen to get herself a cup to put some tea into. Her eyes glanced over to the clock and she happily sighed. John should be home soon.

A knock came at the door and Anna's eyebrow rose. No one had called her or texted her today to say they were coming over. Tomorrow Mary and Sybil insisted on doing one last girls' night before the babies' arrival. Being mothers themselves, they knew how those would be few and far between for a while after the babies were born.

Waddling to the door, she peeked out through the side window. A smile graced her face when she saw who was on the other side.

"Hello," she happily stated, opening the door to Elsie.

"Oh, look at you, absolutely glowing," Elsie breathed. "May I?" She asked, reaching her hands toward Anna's belly.

"Of course," Elsie's lips curled into a proud smile, as she rested her hands on Anna's round belly. "You look wonderful."

Anna shook her head, before leading Elsie into the house.

"I feel like a house. The babies don't move nearly as much as they used to. They are getting crowded in there. Two more weeks to go."

"You can do it," Elsie encouraged.

"Yes, I can. I need them to stay in there long enough to be healthy little ones," Anna rubbed the side of her belly, where she felt an elbow or knee jutting out.

"And Sybil says they are doing well?"

Anna's eyes brightened. "Yes. Two healthy, strong babies."

"Oh Anna, that makes me so happy for you."

"Me too."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_2 Weeks Later_

Anna and John laid in bed. Anna was pressed up against John and he was running his hand up and down her arm lovingly. Tomorrow was the big day and Anna couldn't settle. Soon they would have two babies to hold, to love. The thought was exhilarating and terrifying.

"John," Anna whispered into the darkness. She felt his hand pause and then run up the length of her arm, resting on her shoulder.

"Yes, my darling," he said, before pressing a kiss on the side of her neck.

"I'm nervous," she confessed. John's arm snaked around her side and pulled her closer to him.

"You're going to do amazing. Although, I do wish you would change your mind about the epidural. I don't want you in pain," he told her.

"I…I know. It's just…"

"About control," he finished. He understood. An epidural would take away that control she needed. At the last appointment, both babies were positioned in a way for a vaginal delivery. As long as they were still that way in the morning, Sybil told her they would be able to proceed. Anna did understand if they weren't then she would need a C-section. The babies' health came first.

"Yes," Anna agreed. She awkwardly turned so she could see John. Her hands came up to his cheeks and she pulled his lips to hers. "I…I want to be together one more time before the babies come," she said, before catching his lips again.

"Anna are you sure that's a good idea?" Anna sat back slightly. They hadn't been intimate since the day she slapped him across the face.

"Yes," she replied after some thought. "Once the babies are born, it'll be a while before we can be together like this again." Her right hand ran down his face and landed on his bare chest. She could feel his heart beating harshly in his chest. He wanted this just as much as she did.

"Are you sure?" He tried to search her eyes, but the darkness made it difficult to read them. She answered by grabbing his hand and placing it between her legs.

"Please, John. I _need_ this." At her words, he couldn't deny her anything.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

_The Next Day _

Twelve hours. Twelve excruciating hours if you asked John. But now twelve hours later and Anna was finally ready to push. He couldn't believe how stoic and strong she had been through all the pain to this point. As every contraction hit and every centimeter dilated, she remained insistent that she didn't want an epidural.

"Alright, John, I'm going to need you to hold a leg," Sybil instructed. His face blanched and he swallowed hard.

"I…I think I am good staying up here with her, cheering her on," John stated, he felt Anna squeeze his hand as a contraction hit her hard.

"Oh alright," Sybil said with a laugh. She had a nurse hold up the leg John would have held and began coaching Anna through the pushing process.

John watched as his wife's face contorted and she bore down with all her might.

"Good, take a short break until the next one comes."

"You're doing so well, my darling," he murmured into her ear. His hand came up to push a damp hair off her forehead.

Soon, the head was crowning and Anna's moans were growing stronger.

"You can do it," John encouraged.

"The head is out," Sybil said. "One more good push and we'll have the first baby." Another contraction hit and soon they both heard the cry. "It's your girl. Hope is here." Sybil said happily. She did a quick wipe down of the baby, placed her into a blanket and then pulled the baby up and over into Anna's arms. "Snuggle with your girl for a few minutes, before brother decides to make his appearance."

Anna and John both glanced down at their new daughter with tears in their eyes. Anna's finger ran down the length of Hope's jawline. The baby cooed and the two of them laughed.

"She looks like you," John whispered into Anna's ear, before kissing her forehead. "She's perfect."

"She really is."

Soon another contraction hit. The nurse took Hope and now Anna had to focus on delivering Kit.

"I'm so tired," Anna cried, the reality of having to go through the process again feeling daunting.

"You are so strong, my darling. You can do it," he told her strongly. He grabbed her hand again and cheered her as she pushed. A second set of lungs entered the world with a nice loud cry.

"He's here," Sybil said happily, doing the same as she had with Hope.

As Kit was placed into Anna's arms, she began to cry.

"We did it," Anna cried, running her finger along Kit's jaw just as she had to Hope's.

"You did it," he stated, kissing her head once again. "You were amazing and now we have these two beautiful babies." Sybil brought Hope back over and handed her to John.

"Let me have Kit for a moment and then you can have him right back." Anna handed Kit to Sybil, before resting back into the pillows.

"You should rest," John told her. Anna nodded, while her eyes were stuck on their daughter in John's hands. She hadn't known just how wonderful it would be to see their child within his strong arms.

Sybil brought Kit back over, placing him gently into Anna's arms.

"Both babies look great. Hope is just at 5 lbs. Kit is 5 lbs. 6 oz. You did great, Anna," Sybil said sincerely. "Have a phone or camera so I can take your first family picture?"

John quickly grabbed his phone out of his back pocket and handed it over to Sybil, before sitting down next to Anna for a picture.

"I'm sure I look awful," Anna complained, attempting a smile for the picture.

"You look absolutely radiant, my darling," he promised, before Sybil snapped a few pictures.

After she was done, Sybil and the nurses left to give the two of them some time with their new babies alone as a family. John laid a sleeping Hope into one of the bassinets and then took Kit from Anna's arms. Her eyes were slowly fading.

"Rest, my love. Our babies and I will be right here when you awake," before he could even finish his sentence, soft snores could be heard coming from Anna's lips. John smiled. He glanced down at Kit's face and couldn't stop the smile from spreading across all his features.

"Hello, Kit," John said. The small babe's lips curled into an o and his eyes seemed to be trying to focus on the person holding him. The lips fell out of the o and his bottom lip began to quiver. Not wanting to wake Anna or Hope, John gently bounced Kit in his arms and the baby began to settle. "There, there little one. Don't be scared. I am your daddy. And you have a big sister- by only a few moments- and the best mommy in the whole wide world, Kit. Soon you'll realize just how lucky you are to have her as your own. She's the strongest and bravest person I know." Adjusting Kit so that his head was resting on John's shoulder, he went to sit on the rocking chair and began to rock.

_To be continued..._

_I think there is just one more chapter left and it makes me a little sad. Please don't forget to let me know what you think! As always, thank you all! _


	17. Chapter 17

_I have to admit that I am quite sad to see this story come to an end. I have enjoyed writing it, as I hope you have reading it. Here is the final installment. Enjoy! _

**Chapter 17 **

_Six Months Later _

A soft cry woke John up from his deep sleep. He turned to his side to find that Anna was already out of bed. Checking the video monitor on his bedside table, he saw Anna walking with one of the twins in the nursery. A smile crept up his lips and he climbed out of the bed to see if Anna needed any help.

When he reached the nursery, Anna had moved to the rocking chair and was nursing Hope. Standing in the doorway, John couldn't stop his smile from spreading even wider. His wife was amazing. She awoke nightly with the twins without a complaint to him. The two only woke up once a night now, but he knew it still took a toll out on her. She had insisted on breastfeeding them both and she was wonderful at it. John helped in other ways. He went into work later so she could sleep later in the mornings and as soon as he came home, he would take the twins so she could have some time to herself.

Anna glanced up and saw John in the doorway. She brought her free hand up to her lips telling him to stay quiet. John nodded. Soon, Hope was asleep in Anna's arms. She got up and placed her back into her bed.

Stepping out of the room, Anna bent up and gave John a kiss.

"What was that for?" John whispered. Anna's cheeks flushed.

"I'm just happy. I have you, Hope, and Kit. I never knew I could be this happy," she smiled.

"Me too, my darling. Let's go to bed," he said quietly, taking her hand and leading her to the bedroom.

When they reached the room, he let go of her hand and crept it up to the small of her back. He begun to run small circles and Anna moaned at his touch. Glancing at her, he saw her eyes were closed and neck was tilted back slightly as she enjoyed his little massage. The sight of her face in the moonlight made him groan. How he had been so lucky to have her, he would never know.

The two hadn't been intimate since the night before the birth of the twins. They were both always so tired. While the two little ones brought so much joy into their lives, they also brought so much tiredness.

Anna seemed to read his mind, because soon she was standing in front of him. Her fingers grazed against his bare back and she bit her lower lip. John, instinctively, reached for the edges of her shirt so he could pull it up, but Anna's hands moved to stop him.

"I….there's still so much extra weight there," she said, her cheeks blushing slightly. John didn't say anything. Instead, he fell to his knees and slowly inched up her shirt. He kissed the skin that wasn't as tight as it used to be, but just as beautiful.

"You grew our babies in here," he said, his eyes glancing up at her. He slowly inched himself up, while pulling the shirt up over her head at the same time. Once the shirt was over her head, he bent forward and caught her lips into his. Anna's hands wrapped around his frame and pulled him into a deeper kiss.

Slowly, the two of them climbed into the bed while keeping their lips together. Anna's hands grazed over the top of his pants and she skirted her hands just above the top, before beginning to pull them down. John happily helped and soon he was fully unclothed.

"I'll be right back," he told her, hopping from the bed to run to the restroom. He hated stopping right in the middle of it all, but he had been needing to go since he had awoken earlier.

Stepping back into their bedroom, a chuckle left his lips. Snores could be heard from Anna's lips. He climbed into the bed and wrapped his arms around her sleeping frame. He sighed, but happily allowed her to sleep. She needed it.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

When John got home from work the next day, he could hear _Baby Shark _being played on the television. He both cursed and thanked the song for its existence. It seemed to calm both children, but it also had to be played over and over most days.

Walking into the living room, he found Hope playing in the playpen on the floor. He glanced down and gave her a smile. Seeing her father, her smile met his. She cooed and wiggled her arm. John looked up and saw that Anna was asleep on the couch with Kit at her breast. He walked over to her and gingerly pulled Kit out of her hands. The boy grabbed at John's nose making him laugh.

"Hello, why don't you go and play with your sister," John said, taking Kit to the playpen and sitting him into it with Hope. The two babies squealed in delight being next to one another. The sight of the two of them together made John's heart swell.

Once he knew they were content, he walked over to Anna. He planned on gently waking her up and suggesting she go to their bedroom to get in a better nap. However, as he sat, her open laptop grabbed his attention. There was a Google search pulled up on the screen with words like parole and letter. He glanced more closely and realized Anna was thinking about writing a letter to the parole board about Green. His jaw tightened. He didn't want his wife to ever have to think about that man again. While he knew that would never be completely possible, he didn't want him thrown into her face. He wondered if someone had asked her to write a letter or if it was her own choice. Green would be up for parole soon. That thought had haunted them both for a while now.

"Hi," Anna said, her voice still full of sleep. John turned to her and offered her a soft smile.

"You can go and lie down in our bed. I have the kids," he told her, bending down and kissing her forehead.

Anna leisurely sat up and her arms rose with a yawn that escaped her lips. When her eyes landed on her laptop, she reached over to close it.

"I already saw it," John informed her. Anna's teeth caught her lower lip and she glanced away.

"I…was thinking of writing the parole board to explain why Alex Green shouldn't be let out on parole early," Anna explained. Her lips twisted uneasily and she sighed. Seeing her anxiousness, John lovingly grabbed her hands into his.

"Why wouldn't you tell me?"

"I…I don't know. Maybe because I haven't made up my mind yet," she replied, her eyes met John's. "Part of me wants to, but the other part of me just wants to drop it. Let it go." John's hand ran up her arm and landed on the top of her shoulder.

"You know that I'll support you, no matter what, right?"

"I do," Anna said sincerely. Her lips attempted a smile, but her lower lip trembled slightly. She shook her head and tried to contain her emotions.

"No one will hurt you ever again," John promised her strongly.

"I hope that's true," Anna said softly. At that, both babies screeched loudly, demanding their parents' attention.

"Alright, alright," John teased, standing up and reaching down for Hope. He handed her to Anna, before picking up Kit and placing him into his lap. "Should we take them on a stroll around the neighborhood?"

"Yes, that would be nice."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Bedtime was one of John's favorite times of the day. Both of the children were always so calm and he got all of the cuddles in with them during this time most of all. As they grew older, they were becoming busier. In the evenings, however, they just wanted to curl against his chest.

Anna would nurse one and then hand whichever one finished first to John. Tonight that was Hope. John took Hope into the nursery and sat down on the rocking chair, before pulling a book off the shelf to read to her.

"Ah, _Good Night Moon._" John read through the story, gently rocking the chair. Hope's hand reached out for the pages and he chuckled as she prevented him from turning the page. "Do you like the mice?" He asked her; she attempted to bring the book to her lips so she could chew on the edge.

It was then that Anna walked in with Kit already curled against her chest, halfway asleep. John pressed a kiss on the top of Hope's soft hair and stood, bouncing her slightly. He turned her so her chest rested on his. Almost immediately, her head fell to his shoulder and she calmed.

"_Somewhere over the rainbow,_" Anna started to sing. It had become their tradition for Anna to sing the first verse of the song to them as they laid the children down into their beds. As both babies laid in their beds, Anna continued to sing and their eyelids fluttered closed.

Quietly, John and Anna escaped the bedroom. Anna then, grabbed John's hand and led him to their room.

"I won't fall asleep tonight, Mr. Bates," she said playfully, pushing him onto the bed.

"It's okay that you did. I know the babies…" He was cut off by her lips on top of his.

"Shh, no talk of the babies right now," she said between kisses. John hungrily met back her kisses with his own. It wasn't long before the two were back into their regular rhythm. The time apart and birth had not changed too much.

When they were both satisfied, the two laid together as their breaths slowly became even again. John's fingers ran up and down Anna's arm and he kissed the curve of her neck.

"You're incredible, you know that?" He whispered into her ear. Anna turned to face him and rested her hand on the side of his cheek.

"You are too."

"I love you," John murmured, kissing her cheek. Anna sighed and pushed her head into his chest. She could feel his heart beating harshly.

"I love you, too."

**The End**

_I know not everything with Green was wrapped up, but I think that's life. As I wrote this story, his fate changed over the course of the story and sometimes we don't get the ending we hope for in these situations. All in all, I am happy with it's ending. I hope you are too. Thank you for reading! _


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